Sorry About Obama

Upset at my wife for screwing up my pizza prep work creation.
When do I mix eggplant with sweet peppers & onions on pizza? The eggplant is the star. It’s like Lebron crashing Kimmel unannounced after an interview with Kobe after he wins his 2nd Oscar.

Cam Newton is giving up sex to improve his Quarterback play. Broadway Joe had more attractive options to nail up the middle in midtown Manhattan. Joan from Mad Men isn’t supporting her kids on her executive assistant salary in 60’s Charlotte.

Barr upon receiving the Mueller report.
Trump has ties to Russia. Duh, most mail order bride owners do. You’re not recording this conversation like that two faced Michael Cohen , are you? Hey, Bob, define Alt Right, you treacherous snake.

INT. Office
Mueller drops his report on Barr’s desk.
Barr
I worked on a screenplay parody of Wag the Dog for 2 years once.
But I’m sure NBC owned Universal Studio’s will sugarcoat your reviews on The Black List. Mueller’s bound for WGA glory.

Barr upon receiving the Mueller report on his desk.
What do you for a living again Bob? I’m a special prosecutor hired to find evidence of Russian election interference. Oh, so you’re a bullshit artist. History will not be kind to you Bob.

Mueller concludes the Russian investigation. It states, Holograms of Drago didn’t pop up in voting booths, threatening, “Vote Trump or I’ll break you.”

Former Australian PM blames #Breitbart for New Zealand Terror attack. Does he blame Obama for the dead autopsy technician who performed the autopsy on it’s Jewish founder Andrew Breitbart. Arsenic was found in his system. Sure it was bad luck.

Sorry about Obama. What, only baby face Omar can utter such a universal truth affecting all Americans today? I want to see Democrats wear this shirt so bad. At least, it would show self-awareness, knowing he tried to wipe out whitey with Fentanyl, Larry the Cable Guy’s extended family included.

Lower the voting age to 16? Let’s use Blockbuster cards for voting ID while we’re at it. And imagine a time pre-911, when Bill Clinton was known as a mere chubby chaser. Hillary stole China from the White House, thinking, “What difference does, it make?”

Bernie Sanders wants to hook up Iran with more nuke gifting money again. So resistors, unless you’re so called leadership does anything to deter nuclear proliferation versus giving Iran a green light to annihilate, shut up already, thanks.

What happened to your balls #Roseanne? 1st, the Ambian made you tweet. Now, Sarah Gilbert is the reason you got fired. Triple down, Valerie Jarrett still lives with Obama, she authored the Nuke gifting Iran deal and is Obama’s Arabian horse whisperer.

Planned Parenthood President says, “There’s no such thing as Infanticide in medical care.” Just pre-mediated murder like OJ without being hopped on coke before murdering Nicole.

 

INT. HOME
Stay At Home Comedian
Has anyone complimented on you that top at work?
Wife
No, but everyone loves my new hair cut. They think I look like a super model.
Stay At Home Comedian
I feel bad for Tori Spelling.

INT. Daughters Bedroom
Daughter
Daddy, why did you dump all those woman before mama?
Stay At Home Comedian
When I kissed them, the walls weren’t pulsating with a life energy of their own like I was tripping on boomers for starters.

The End

By,

Michael Kornbluth

 

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