Cauliflower Angel Wings

Pissing of my off wife for playing the most non-rocking, Indy Rock music on a Friday night imaginable ever. What band is this babe, Petrified Forest? You’re jamming your white privilege down my throat babe.

Wrap up a great call with an old friend from High School.
Daddy, you were on the phone forever. Is mommy boring you to death already? Get back to me in 13 years and I’ll be empathetic.

INT. Pediatrician
Doctor
At 2, you breast feed Samuel?
That’s common.
Wife
Actually, it’s only 1 percent.
Do It All Dad
So feel good about us being in the top 1 percent for a change.
You’re still waiting for me to make it. I’ve heard.

INT. Pediatrician
Doctor
You should get your daughter involved in Girl Scouts for social structure. But be careful, they’re clicky.
Stay At Home Comedian
Clicky means, closed off to befreinding Martha Dump Truck no matter what.

INT. BEDROOM
Daughter
Daddy, I learned at school, my hair brown hair color is the most popular one. 55 percent of other kids have it.
Do It all Dad
A funny joke to insert now would be. So most popular is actually most common. But you’re perfect.

Google not working in my favor.
Daddy, how many zeros in a Trillion? And don’t Google it.
Do you call yourself a degenerate Jew because you have to count with your fingers for simple arithmetic?

Stay At Home Comedian flirting with the Pediatrician nurse.

My son attends Kids Cottage for Pre-K.
If they wanted an urbanized, branding refresh, they’d rename it Kid & Play’s Cottage.
Nurse laughs long tie.

INT. Pediatrician
Doctor
Never play with dead animals Matilda.
Stay At Home Comedian
Roger Waters wouldn’t have written The Wall if he only listened to his pediatrician.

EXT. PARK SWINGS
Daughter
What’s for dinner daddy?
Stay At Home Comedian
Cauliflower Angel Wings.
Daddy, we’re not Christians.
Stay At Home Comedian
I’m just exercising #MyWhitePrivilege right to offend Islamic Americans.

The End

By

Michael Kornbluth

One thought on “Cauliflower Angel Wings

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