Jared Kushner’s Smart

Netanyahu inviting the new Ukrainian Comedian President to Israel.
Trump armed the Ukraine, so you’re cool in my book. Got any good Huma Licker jokes for me? Jackie Mason is beginning to sound a tad repetitive for my taste.

My favorite Russian ads on Facebook about Hillary.
Bernie is a fake news communist.
Fuck that disbarred bitch.
Chelsea isn’t ugly anymore.
Lolita Express Equals Rape Plane
Seth Rich and Julian Assange Rule

How did Russia help Trump get elected again? Did a hologram of Drago appear in previous blue state voting booths in PA demanding, vote Trump or I’ll break you? Resist this absurdist pointed joke losers.

Jared Kushner on soon to be released Middle East Peace Plan.
The Palestians will charge America of apartheid supported collusion regardless.

Jared Kushner on Jamal Khashoggi’s death.
The Saudi’s aren’t into Muslim Brotherhood propagandists. I sold them Tomahawk Missiles. They’re guided by a new prince. He knows being held hostage by radical jihadists bile is bad for business.

Jared Kushner on Jamal Khashoggi’s death.
What do you want from me? Unlike Jim Acosta, his press credentials are revoked permanently. The Saudi’s aren’t too fond of the Washington Compost. Mark Levin wrote that for me.

Jared Kushner on soon to be released Middle East Peace Plan.
The Palestians will withhold their call to refrain from violence in less time than it takes me to burst with Ivanka in sheer talking dirty to me in Mandarin.

Closed door meeting between Twitter CEO Jack Dorsey and President Trump.
Jack, can I call you jack? You only exist because of me. Fuck Milo. Nobody misses his tweets. Without me, Twitter is dead. And journalists lose all reason for living.

Closed door meeting between Twitter CEO Jack Dorsey and President Trump continued.
Is your friend Fake News Fro Collin Kaepernick enjoying the largest unemployment check cut ever recorded? Just curious dude. Do you ever trim that thing?

Bill Deblasio fighting climate change.
No more glass skyscrapers. They contribute more to global warming than team AOC’s clambaking sessions in her entourage of SUV’s from the boogie down Bronx to her dealers more gentrified brownstone hoods in Park Slope.

New York Times apologizing to it’s readers when Trump wins all 50 states in 2020. It was a nice run while it lasted. The National Inquirer is still standing. Tabloid journalism needed an elitist powerhouse to take over it.
Democrats calling on Republicans to impeach Trump is an Eastern Worshiper Hail Mary of the most deplorable, desperate, laughable order. Be more of a transparent sore loser twat, Twitter.
Memo to Governor Cuomo.
Biden has the best shot to beat Trump.
Is Don Jr. banging Eric Trump’s made up widow?
Is Trump inhaling Kellyanne Conway’s hair with camera’s blaring to ensure she’s washed the stench of porkie George out of her hair?

Florida felons love Trump. Trump was gangsta before he killed off the Bush Dynasty, ushered in prison reform & pardoned Jack Johnson. Gang banger reformer Jim Brown got his back. Felons wouldn’t fuck Uni Brow Maddow with Michelle’s dick.

Bernie Sanders want to give voting rights to the Boston Bomber.
What about Seth Rich Bernie? He’s more alive than that POS inside. Stay morally strong smear breath.

EXT. WHITE HOUSE
Kid
Build the Wall.
Trump
It’s happening kid.
Kid
Well, Ann Coulter isn’t over her blue balls yet. So get cracking.

INT. DENTIST OFFICE
Friends plays.
Stay At Home Comedian
My favorite bottled water is Smart Water. It adds an extra bounce to my step.
When I drink it, I feel like Jennifer Aniston on the rebound.

Hygienist laughs long time.

INT. HOME
Wife
I tried to tell you about buying these rugs.
You can clean our new rug in the wash.
Stay At Home Comedian
Stop talking. Because of you I want to roll up something earlier than usual.

The End

By,

Michael Kornbluth

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