Pro Bush Ellen

My kids getting jealous of Captain America. Captain America got moves. He’s like Collin Kaepernick 2 seasons in before he started sporting pig socks depicting cops thinking he was the 2nd coming of B Reel. Daughter, stop acting like he’s real.

INT. HOME

Daughter

Did you know the Mayans invented Chocolate?

Do It All Dad

Dada’s Double Imperial Stout, which I pounded in 5 minutes flat last night, was made with bits of coco was called Mexican Cake. It was a far cry from STD catching Mexicali Blues.

Morning Prayer: God, don’t let me get mad at my wife for wasting almost the entire fresh squeezed OJ on our 3 kids for lunch, the one day a year, I fast to atone for being a right minded, judgmental prick, for the comedic betterment of all mankind, Amen.

INT. HOME

Daughter

Look at this Palomino Dada, she’s so pretty.

Do It All Dad Are all Palomino’s blondies?

Daughter

Daddy’s attracted to Palomino’s.

Do It All Dad

Do you think they’re lady like enough to pluck their face hair when men aren’t present?

 

Dinero harassing his VP of Production in a bathrobe. You had no problem with me flicking ashes off my bathrobe in Casino. Rodney could get away with it but I can’t. Have I told you how much Viagra I take to stay hard around girls I can’t shit on?

I feel like less all over the place Jew, whenever my son cries about mama cutting his fingernails to deep. Especially, knowing, how much pride she derives from her exacting, Nurse persona, responsible for keeping premature babies alive status.

Teenage girls who declare themselves as boys are allowed breast removal without their parents permission today. If my daughter takes after mama. It won’t be too much of load off her shoulders.

They have sex week in college now. It’s like spin the bottle with dicks during bum rush week.

Humanity is doomed if Global Warming isn’t reversed. Let’s start with CNN calling ANTIFA  out, for the fascist, anarchists paid, pawns of treacherous, shadow government insurgencies for starters.

The MAGA hat is a covert symbol of white supremacy, San Diego City College? I’d care about your adopted, non critical piggy backed opinion, if the Full House chick thought enough of your school to bribe her daughter into it.

INT. HOME

Wife

My nurse friends work complain about their husbands expecting blow jobs more than once a year on their birthday.

Do It All Dad

Your vagina has fifty million more sensitive synapses. And greater drillage, dentage, toys to play with babe.

 

INT. HOME

Do It All Dad

Matilda, how does a boy at 8 identify as Transgender?

Daughter

Doesn’t Transgender, just mean gay in girl’s clothing? Does that mean Shakespeare was Transgender because he dressed like a girl in all his plays.

 

INT. HOME

Do It All Dad

Matilda, how does a boy at 8 identify as Transgender?

Daughter

Arthur shrieks like a girl when Baby clobbers him in the face. Arthur also fights dirty and pulls my hair. Maybe, he identifies as a fake news tough diva on Glow.

 

INT. HOME

Do It All Dad

Matilda, how does a boy at 8 identify as Transgender?

Daughter

Transgender is a boy who never outgrows playing dress up with his sister? Or a girl with short hair, who insists on wearing pants on a TV variety comedy show.

 

Michael Kornbluth

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