Dad, Doesn’t Love You That Much

My Wife is from Victoria, in Australia originally. We wanted to get married there but my mom shot down the wish real fast. Mom calls.  “Son, Australia is a long flight from New York and your father doesn’t love you that much.”

My compromise for my wife was, “Babe, assuming we have a boy one day, instead of hiring a Rabbi for the kid’s circumcision, will hire Crocodile Dundee. Just so we can hear a roomful of Jews say, “Now that’s a knife, you can chop it all with that thing.”

But while we’re on the subject of circumcising private parts, Bruce Jenner wasn’t asexual married to Kris Jenner. But I’m positive Bruce Jenner was able to stay harder longer, after he convinced Kris to cut her hair shorter, so she could look more like a dolled-up Ralph Machio.

Michael Kornbluth


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