It’s hard to completely love Sammy Hagar when you’re a recovering alcoholic. He gets to rock out for 4 decades to your 1 because you pissed your bed without fail throughout your late twenties. I’d be pissed to. Especially, if you never got try to his Tequilla. Why Can’t This Be Love blasts on surround sound at the local cantina in Hermosa Beach as a Recovering Alcoholic mutters to himself over his Quiona stuffed burrito during Cinco De Mayo, “Fuck Sammy Hagar, I hear his tequila tastes Van Halen light.”
Michael Kornbluth