I post a bit on my WordPress blog about taking Adderall to Temple because organized religion in person makes me feel very disorganized. Some random, commentator’s commentary was, “I find it interesting that non-practicing and non-religious Jews are the most introspective about their annoying Jewy identify than any other sub-group, really, Catholics indulge a bit to, if you can make it through Dogma without longing for Brody to replace Damon as the arch angel of death if you can’t get past Matt playing the Jew hating WASP a tad too well in School Ties, without Kevin Smith moonlighting as a script doctor on the script this time around. I reply, “Jews have a monopoly on introspection now? Who knew? You’d think moderate Muslims were the ones who made a killing in the Psychotherapy business after all these years.”
The most comically annoying part of her pretend ironically detached assertion was that non-religious or non-practicing Jews today actually advertise any affiliation with their Jewish ancestry because they worship false idols like Dr. Gnocchi, pretend ANTIFA are Klan firefighters, accuse Israel of genocide on Twitter for refusing to be pushover putzy, support NFL kneelers kicking Nazi destroyers in the nuts and reduce Trump voters to Nazi’s despite Jimmy Fallon failing to rub of his hair on the Tonight Show, which turned his writers into haters because a real life skinhead never emerged. The same fake news good Jews who insist on sucking off Obama Be Good till their last dying breath despite him posting all of Israel’s nuclear hiding sites on Al Jazeera earth to give Sharia Law a greater chance because Muslim Extremist lives matter most, especially knowing what useful partners they were to Hitler in World 2, right Barry? So, cut the bullshit Obama, you love Hitler so much more than Trump. Financing the bioweapon of death made in Wuhan wasn’t your idea either Obama. That belongs to Gates and Fauci, this is the year of the 4 eyed snake remember? You only wish you were that organized. Although you did get close after giving 150 billion to Iran after they promised to take a time out from building nukes to destroy Israel, so the number one sponsor of terror worldwide could use the money to create overseas manufacturing jobs for Build a Bear to make their economy less reliant on the sale of chest removal cream for the Kardashians.
Son asks, “Daddy, who published the Bible first?” I say, “Moses self-published the Old Testament first but don’t call it a vanity press because that’s not kosher in God’s book. Later Moses handed out the Bible to the 12 tribes of Israel on a pro-bono basis while insisting they transcribe it by hand and have each leader write a Torah scroll themselves because Xerox sales reps from CT were too white, pasty and humorless to come across as believable chosen members of the tribe, who were capable of infiltrating that sales territory with any divine powered sales authority whatsoever.
Youngest son asks, “How big is God?” I say, “Bigger than Obama’s ego. Despite Kenya not printing any money in his likeness yet.” Obama’s so not money, and Kenyans know it, Challah. Jewish introspection lives, thank you very much.