Do It All Dad Does Jokes Dedication Intro

Do It All Dad Jokes is a pre-election comedy special dedicated to the silent majority of Americans who haven’t lost their sense of humor yet. It’s also dedicated to the funniest President of all time ,whose made ball busting great again, despite the Russian collusion witch hunt, which had less legs than Lieutenant Dan. Oh yeah, when Bob Mueller testified in front of Congress, we learned he parts his hair with good old fashioned elbow grease.

Do It All Dad Does Jokes is also dedicated to my comedy heroes such as Rodney, Don Rickles, The Dice Man and the late great Joan Rivers. They’re comedic DNA has become my own. Joan lives.  In particular Do It All Dad Does Jokes is an all-star showcase of highly topical jokes, making fun of the resistance insanity, that’s consumed Hollywood, Media, Big Tech and our culture at large ever since Hillary Hammer Time Cankles lost, kicking off the never ending excuse tour, proving, baby boomer arrogance never dies.

For those who’ve been clamoring for actual laugh generating jokes, that aren’t about demonizing the big, bad, blond wolf in the White House, then you’re in for a real treat. And for those, who take offense at bits such as Quiet Riots My Ass, Defending Those Devilish Jews Again,  Kneeling Is Spitting On Vets Graves, MAGA Hats and Skinheads Don’t Mesh, Masks Are The New Condoms, Hamilton Is Worse than Obama Rapping and Collin Kaepernick Sports A Fake News Fro. Then, go woke yourself or move to China and work for Elon Musk for all I care. You don’t care about making American comedy great again, but I do.

I wouldn’t have been able to create this elusive killer set as a stay at home comedian, hosting my Do It All Dad Year Podcast for the past 3 plus years without my biggest booster in the universe, my infinitely, funnier, sweet twin, Matilda Singing Rose Kornbluth, to look after and entertain her 2 adoring younger brothers in my pursuit to make the world laugh for a living and serve lady laugh with all my God given, punchy might.

Controlling our kids with comedy, can make our kids great again, my 3 fuss free kids, 98 percent of the time, are living proof of it.  Last, I want to thank my Do It All Nurse Wife, whose loving support, begrudging or not, that’s provided me the freedom and time to take creative chances, hone my craft and break on through to the other side of comedy heaven, where Rodney says to me one day, “You produced 3 amazing kids but your jokes were perfect.”

 

My Very Best,

Michael Kornbluth

Notes From A Triggered Proofreader

You know your editor isn’t enamored with your fellow Israelites, when she insists you’re arrogant for making a crusade joke, because I point out how killing Jews who refuse to acknowledge Jesus as their lord and savior is as arrogant as it gets. But I’m the one perpetuating negative stereotypes of Jewish people for being greedy about making all the Nazi jokes I want, because Nazis require safe spaces now to. Go woke yourself. The Swastika does look like 2 stick figures doing a sixty nine on Crystal Meth. Also, you gotta love comments such as, “I’ve never met any Muslim Holocaust deniers.” I didn’t know Plano, Texas turned into a no-go zone for Farrakhan licker jokes, my bad. Also, name a comic who isn’t cocky, and I’ll be glad to tell you how much he sucks in real time, long time.

Michael Kornbluth

The Oliver Twat Twist

Jon Stewart minus east coast charisma, a handsome mug or any parcel of distinguished grey, otherwise known as bean breath Oliver on Last Week Tonight, insists the the 2 month old riots in Portland have been”mostly peaceful”, where law officers are being blinded by lasers and ducking Molotov Cocktails while protecting the People’s Court of Portland from turning into Burning Man meets ANTIFA on Crystal Meth.  If I had any self-respect for the violent demonstrations of unrestrained anarchy from ANTIFA, BLM, or encouraged lawlessness from Don Lemon’s float like a butterfly lisp, I’d share my parents HBO Go code to a radical WI-FI Bank in need, because I’ve got no reason to support this fake news chill pill spiel, knowing all the leftist media lionizing behind sanctuary cities and nonstop white washing of violence and destruction caused by punisher vigilantes in hoodies in Charlottesville and beyond, which started this around clock resistance to law and order, since Hillary Hammer Time Cankles lost in the 1st place, despite getting the debate questions in advance because America doesn’t care for Godless, pretentious, unhuggable cunts, unless they rock cute sweaters and tell edgless jokes on day time TV for a living, who are pro Bush, right Ellen? What does Ellen do with her friend W exactly? Invite W over to her estate with Michelle Obama to play Operation, Pre-Op Edition, while Portia De Rossi poses nude for some late night painting,  if W promises to paint her with a machete hacking off her privileged clit, because he wanted to make Michelle proud of her country again, after Ellen refused to wash her stink box for a whole year without Paltrow’s Guava Mist, despite her air of superiority embedded in it’s branding, inside and out. 

Michael Kornbluth

Fake News Christians Aren’t Charitable

INT. HOME

Do It All Dad pitches his new book The Great American Jew Novel to his wife’s friend.

Wife

It’s very Jewy.

Do It All Dad

Jews don’t have a monopoly on being stingy with emotive praise either.

But I’m glad my ultra Jewy, unapologetic title has you 2 non-believing gentiles clutching for the comfort from the missing crucifix around your necks.

Michael Kornbluth