The Italian Reptilian Inside

Andrew Cuomo looks like Mama Fratelli from Goonies and the Thing had a baby.  And why is the Italian Reptilian releasing rapists in the streets of NYC again?  There’s no more helpless elderly to rape. Plus, if he’s so worried about the rapist prisoners spreading the Coronavirus inside jail, can’t the Golden Girls hit man Cuomo order the wardens to send the most prolific rapists to the Hole, knowing New York City bars have plenty of chicken wings to spare because they’re no longer considered sophisticated enough bar grub for the cold blooded Italian Reptilian inside.

Michael Kornbluth

Funnier Dad, Happier Babies

Whenever I’m out with my 3 kids without mommy, older woman swoon, constantly commenting to me, “Your kids are so happy together.” My reply, “Funnier dad, happier babies. I’ll wreck you in a photo off boomer dad. My kids have more muscle memory to flex from. Sorry, about you still thinking you’re the superior parent within all spheres of life, because because baby boomer arrogance never dies.  At the same time, my 3 fuss free kids 98% of the time, are all glowing beneficiaries of the attachment parenting, which is turning your bed into the a 24/7 open milk bar for the foreseeable future. It’s the equivalent of planting seeds of self-esteem on steroids. So they’re not suffering from any major abandonment issues, for being another newborn who has cry it out in the crib upstairs, which is the only reason why our boomer parents bought 2 floor homes in yenta breath country in Long Island  because it makes the muffled cries of despair, easier to bear.”


Michael Kornbluth

Worshiping NPR Gospel Is Dangerous

Doctors telling us to not wear mask is dangerous.  So, is wrecking the economy in attempt to get pedo Joe nominated by any means necessary, you feckless, fake news moralists cunts, of the most despicable order.

But most people don’t know if they have Covid, so you have to wear a mask or else you’ll be branded as an alt-right, science spurning deplorable, who doesn’t do cartwheels over the wide spread celebration of third term abortions on demand because the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Model just thought she was being brave by letting it all hang out like Lena Dunham looking like she swallowed a village of hunchback hobbits from Hipsterville USA.

Michael Kornbluth