Go Woke Yourself

What message is the NBA sending when they suspend an NBA Announcer for the Sacramento Kings who tweets, all lives matter, even the the ones who sport Tighty Whitey’s, Weber?  The King of the Persecution Complex Lebron James, doesn’t approve of this one love message, anti black supremacist message.

Trump deploys the National Guard to D.C and Ice Cube wonders whether Trump will be the first president to nuke a US city?  Call me crazy, but I think somebody is tripping from smoking too much angel dust homes.   Yeah, I’m sure Trump scrapped the nuke gifting deal to Iran to nuke Encino into the stone age instead.

Tear Gas used on looters, rioters, arsonists and cop killers are weapons of mass destruction now?  Trump sending tweets to De-Blasio encouraging him to use the National Guard aren’t working because he cares too much about his daughter maintaining her social justice street cred.

Blaming the police for escalating tension as our cities burn is like blaming Russians for Black Lives Matter MOLOTOV cocktails made with Stoli vodka.

Keith Ellison downplaying his son’s gushing, wholehearted endorsement of ANTIFA on Twitter after they become declared a terrorist organization. ANTIFA didn’t land on George Floyd’s neck.  Also, there’s no evidence ANTIFA is behind these violent protests. Everyone wears a mask now.

Police taking the knee with protesters is an admission of all cops still down with buying Nike jump suits no matter what.

Seth Rogan going off on all his Twitter followers for tweeting Black Lives Matter. It’s not my fault no black people are in my films besides the guy from Hot Tub Machine.  Kevin Heart was in one for a second, before he blew up past ever needing a handout from Judd Apatow ever again. I smoke weed. I hang with Snoop. You think Snoop’s brain hovers a notch below porn hood hell. Well, go woke yourself.

 

Michael Kornbluth

 

Pretend Original Provocateurs

Tyler Perry will be restarting production at his Atlanta studio in July. Resist this Hollywood, have fun being under lock down longer than Portia de Rossi.

If I could do it all over again, I would’ve hired a wise black grandma to replace my no-show Jewish Grandma for my wedding. All I had to do was a post an ad on Craig’s List, “Tyler Perry impersonators are welcome, but you must be comfortable performing in front of white audiences only.”

This is an impersonation of me instructing my son on how to avoid antisemitic backlash at school for whipping out the Dreidel at school during next Christmas season, “Arthur, if the Dreidel lands on Gimmel, don’t say give me all your money because we control the Federal Reserve and all the banks in the North Pole to.”

Trump supporter shaming is so hot right now. It worked so well the last time. Now, the Democrats are freeing rapists and pedophiles to register with Central Casting and offer more gift bags in hopes they’ll vote for Mr. Groper.

Howard Stern ‘s brain has gone to mush, and he can’t blame it on drug abuse, which is even more pathetic. Or maybe, he wasn’t too pointed deep in the 1st place, especially after dropping lines such as, “Trump had disdains for his voters, he’s really a star fucker at heart. What he loves his celebrities, not Joe the Plumber. You mean the same shallow, self-centered celebrities, who never pay for drinks, who for 3 years have been pretending to care about the safety and financial well being of their fellow Americans, 64 million branded racists in particular, because all they’ve done is shit on them ad nauseam, in the hope of trying to shame them into thinking they’re the racist, deplorable, sexist, pieces of shit they’ve become for acting like any opinion contrasting this fake news bullshit forced, maxed out narrative, is worthy of sedition despite their fake news Obama resistor disciple heroes and media mouthpiece lickers, being the real conning, perpetrators of corrupt, encouraged, divisive lawlessness, you dumb, perv protecting, China licking mooks.

Howard Stern hates Trump supporters for voting for Trump because the big bad, blond wolf has rendered weird, weak Howard, irrelevant. Not that Howard was even the King of Social media in the 1st place. But Howard has to give lip service to his ghoulish, tranny conjuring wife to ensure Jimmy Kimmel keeps inviting perm head over to his house for more 2 bite chicken parm dinners.

Trump has disdain for his voters. Then, why does still your president, work 17-hour days for free, when Melania’s around to role play with and throw on her Spies Like Us Mink hat in the nude whenever he likes?

I feel like such a hack for ever being enamored with weird, weak Howard. Knowing Collin Quinn would admit to listening to his show every day never helped. Yeah, yeah, we’ve heard you’re semi famous Collin, for mumbling pro Bush sentiment on Tough Crowd, during W’s never-ending war against Terror as long as radical Islamists kept fucking.

Weird, weak Howard Stern doesn’t hate Trump supporters, he hates how stupid they are for not siding with the party of Rape Wood, sanctuary cities and Hillary Hammer Time Cankles. And after all these years I thought Jackie the Joke Man was the most overpaid hack on the planet.

Side note, any self-admitted Republican gal, pre-Trump who takes offense at a Hillary Hammer Time Cankles reference, because they have “cankles to”, weren’t blessed with the chosen, funny Jew bone for a reason.

Memo to random Breitbart commentator, Christians name drop Jesus way more than your average loudmouth American Jew references his Jewish identity, and fuck you for insisting those proud Hebrews you do know in Ford country in Detroit allegedly, prefer to mind their business and just blend in like ham and cheese sandwiches at my kid’s elementary school, which never went out of style. Then again the ham and cheese sandwich never had a style.

I’m tired about hearing about what slave’s Hasidic woman are. They got Torah, huge families to lean on for company, including their fifty million kids, and Instant Pot cooker’s today to reduce their brisket cooking time by 8000 hours. Hindu’s have arranged marriages and didn’t Muhammad preach the practice of marrying kid wives? Knowing Muhammad’s follower’s fascination with virgins, you’d think the suicide bombing killing ones, ascending up to Allah’s virgin heaven allegedly, had enough blood on their hands already.

The enemy is the virus. I thought it was the army of the east who intentionally walled off Wuhan but allowed all outgoing flights to Milan because of their essential silk robe selling business.

Enough with scapegoating China. If they’re as pure as snow, then why is China resisting investigations into their handling of the Coronavirus more than Aquafresh?

Where’s Eminem these days? He doesn’t have any more Trump Nazi raps to share? Despite Trump lifting the lifetime ban on Jewish membership after he bought Mar-A-Lago, Slim on Facts Shady.

Pretend Original Provocateurs

Tyler Perry will be restarting production at his Atlanta studio in July. Resist this Hollywood, have fun being under lock down longer than Portia de Rossi.

If I could do it all over again, I would’ve hired a wise black grandma to replace my no-show Jewish Grandma for my wedding. All I had to do was a post an ad on Craig’s List, “Tyler Perry impersonators are welcome, but you must be comfortable performing in front of white audiences only.”

This is an impersonation of me instructing my son on how to avoid antisemitic backlash at school for whipping out the Dreidel at school during next Christmas season, “Arthur, if the Dreidel lands on Gimmel, don’t say give me all your money because we control the Federal Reserve and all the banks in the North Pole to.”

Trump supporter shaming is so hot right now. It worked so well the last time. Now, the Democrats are freeing rapists and pedophiles to register with Central Casting and offer more gift bags in hopes they’ll vote for Mr. Groper.

Howard Stern ‘s brain has gone to mush, and he can’t blame it on drug abuse, which is even more pathetic. Or maybe, he wasn’t too pointed deep in the 1st place, especially after dropping lines such as, “Trump had disdains for his voters, he’s really a star fucker at heart. What he loves his celebrities, not Joe the Plumber. You mean the same shallow, self-centered celebrities, who never pay for drinks, who for 3 years have been pretending to care about the safety and financial well being of their fellow Americans, 64 million branded racists in particular, because all they’ve done is shit on them ad nauseam, in the hope of trying to shame them into thinking they’re the racist, deplorable, sexist, pieces of shit they’ve become for acting like any opinion contrasting this fake news bullshit forced, maxed out narrative, is worthy of sedition despite their fake news Obama resistor disciple heroes and media mouthpiece lickers, being the real conning, perpetrators of corrupt, encouraged, divisive lawlessness, you dumb, perv protecting, China licking mooks.

Howard Stern hates Trump supporters for voting for Trump because the big bad, blond wolf has rendered weird, weak Howard, irrelevant. Not that Howard was even the King of Social media in the 1st place. But Howard has to give lip service to his ghoulish, tranny conjuring wife to ensure Jimmy Kimmel keeps inviting perm head over to his house for more 2 bite chicken parm dinners.

Trump has disdain for his voters. Then, why does still your president, work 17-hour days for free, when Melania’s around to role play with and throw on her Spies Like Us Mink hat in the nude whenever he likes?

I feel like such a hack for ever being enamored with weird, weak Howard. Knowing Collin Quinn would admit to listening to his show every day never helped. Yeah, yeah, we’ve heard you’re semi famous Collin, for mumbling pro Bush sentiment on Tough Crowd, during W’s never-ending war against Terror as long as radical Islamists keep fucking.

Weird, weak Howard Stern doesn’t hate Trump supporters, he hates how stupid they are for not siding with the party of Rape Wood, sanctuary cities and Hillary Hammer Time Cankles. And after all these years I thought Jackie the Joke Man was the most overpaid hack on the planet.

Side note, any self-admitted Republican gal, pre-Trump who takes offense at a Hillary Hammer Time Cankles reference, because they have “cankles to”, weren’t blessed with the chosen, funny Jew bone for a reason.

Memo to random Breitbart commentator, Christians name drop Jesus way more than your average loudmouth American Jew references his Jewish identity, and fuck you for insisting those proud Hebrews you do know in Ford country in Detroit allegedly, prefer to mind their business and just blend in like ham and cheese sandwiches at my kid’s elementary school, which never went out of style. Then again the ham and cheese sandwich never had a style.

I’m tired about hearing about what slave’s Hasidic woman are. They got Torah, huge families to lean on for company, including their fifty million kids, and Instant Pot cooker’s today to reduce their brisket cooking time by 8000 hours. Hindu’s have arranged marriages and didn’t Muhammad preach the practice of marrying kid wives? Knowing Muhammad’s follower’s fascination with virgins, you’d think the suicide bombing killing ones, ascending up to Allah’s virgin heaven allegedly, had enough blood on their hands already.

The enemy is the virus. I thought it was the army of the east who intentionally walled off Wuhan but allowed all outgoing flights to Milan because of their essential silk robe selling business.

Enough with scapegoating China. If they’re as pure as snow, then why is China resisting investigations into their handling of the Coronavirus more than Aquafresh?

Where’s Eminem these days? He doesn’t have any more Trump Nazi raps to share? Despite Trump lifting the lifetime ban on Jewish membership after he bought Mar-A-Lago, Slim on Facts Shady.

Michael Kornbluth

I Can’t Get Enough Of Social Distancing

Religious fanatics on the right and coast atheist coastal elitists all and suck and ruin dinner parties for everybody. But nobody highlights this undeniable positive result of social distancing. New Chelsea Handler tit pics don’t count.

 

No more Indian woman on the cover of Land O’ Lakes. How much can you scalp a Land O’ Lakes carton of butter in my parents fridge from 86? I have a bookie friend who used to sell peyote to Craig Carton, who’d like to know.

Just when I think my wife is beyond annoying lately, my younger brother’s wife got her beat. Her take on GI Joe action figures. They’re so nationalistic. My parents were pacifists. So they don’t consider ANTIFA Punisher wannabes as forces of good?

Religious fanatics on the right and coast atheist coastal elitists all and suck and ruin dinner parties for everybody. But nobody highlights this undeniable positive result of social distancing. New Chelsea Handler tit pics don’t count.

 

I’m regretting hiring my younger brother’s wife to teach my kids since the #coronavirus hit. I don’t care I finished my Great American Jew Novel already. I have to endure, so what else are you doing for your birthday besides getting your kids gifts?

Brother’s Tutor wife driving me crazy again. Bush is the reason why you never hear about trade schools in high school. Yeah, I don’t recall Obama sucking off Joe the Plumber either.

It’s only been 1 month for those working from home yet they couldn’t be more restless. Are your kids that much more horrible than you are? Is that Trump’s fault to?

 

My son’s Kindergarten video teacher conference taking an ugly dark turn.  Do you have anything to share Arthur? My dad hates Disney because they own ABC and did everything in their power to discredit #Pizzagate. You should’ve backed off bitch.

#RIPHowardFinkel He was a permanent fixture of my youth and heir apparent to Mean Gene, minus the whiskey marinated voice. What a storied, action packed career, who had been everywhere man. Sleep tight maestro of the play by play mike.

Give a birthday card or shut the fuck up. So you’re just getting your kids a bunch of gifts for your birthday? I gave myself the month of April to write the Great American Jew Novel to shame my Eucharist for pushing in-laws on my kids, which is big.

Michael Kornbluth

Sweating The Triggered Baby Boomers

Mark Zuckerberg, Zit Face Zuck, Good Will Hoodie, Hillary Hammer Time Cankles reason for losing to Trump in addition to be an unhuggable cunt because Facebook ads jumped out laptops across the country, in the form of holograms of Drago from Rocky 4, demanding, “Vote Trump or I’ll break you.”   Yeah, so that Mark Zuckerberg, who founded a company to list a girl’s availability status because he’s never made a cold call in his entire life. Yeah, that Mark Zuckerberg, who tried to screw the alpha dog rowing twins out of their fair share, gets his armpits blow dried before speeches, on conservative censorship. You know the ones where Good Will Hoodie, yuck pits, pretends to act like he has no knowledge of Facebook deliberately deplatforming anyone who dares to get Sasha Baron’s Cohen’s panties in a bunch and post a Toby Keith Playlist or blog detailing any actual Trump accomplishments that didn’t involve renaming ISIS, ISIS so they’d sound more start up friendly in the NY Times.  Because he’s sweating more African Americans walking away from the Democratic party as a result of Diamond and Silk’s incessant, finger waiving bullshit. Plus, the only ones who still use Facebook with any regularity are resistor baby boomers and you must ban any pro Trump supporters on their site because they’ve become such easily triggered elitist, out of touch, douche bags with real God like complexes because baby boomer arrogance never dies.

 

Michael Kornbluth