Diversity is our strength. That’s why ANTIA is so weak. Those pasty, Punisher wannabes in hoodies need Tommy John Surgery every time they throw a Concrete Milkshake at a gay Vietnamese journalist who has a byline in the National Review.
Michael Kornbluth
https://www.buzzsprout.com/2192233/12939223
Set List: Nothing Shitty, Lake on Fire, Chosen Clutch Ones, Hell’s Gate Lives, What’s Eating Gibert and Remembering Freedom.
Kari Lake should be picked as the speaker for Howard University’s graduation ceremony if she becomes Vice President in 2024.
Kamala Harris wanted to be here.
But she pooped out after playing kick the can with her clit in St. Barts.
Eminem called Trump the new Hitler.
But when Trump bought Mar-A- Lago, he lifted the ban on Jewish membership, Slim on Facts Shady.
Remember when Kevin Hart backed out of hosting the Academy Awards over a homophobic tweet?
Did the Hip Hop Gay Mafia get under his skin too?
Did Kevin Hart wake up next to Little Nas holding the dirty Aids needle that the Deep State used to take out Easy E?
What I love about President Trump is his relentless optimism and over the top salesmanship.
If President Trump got pricked with the same dirty needle used to take out Easy E.
The President would tweet on Truth Social the following morning.
“Do I have full blown Aids? Yes, but my T-Cell Count numbers have never been stronger?”
But Robert Kennedy as our new Secretary of State nudged me to allow Dr. Gnocchi to be eaten alive by Michael Vicks prized fight dogs, so it’s all good. MAGA glory lives, Challah, thank you very much.
But back to Kevin Hart. I’m not a Kevin Hart hater, just a short-on-laughs audience member at the BET Awards.
Nicki Minaj and I are tight, alright.
Nicki agrees.
The COVID vaccination shot works less than Russell Westbrook running the Triangle offense.
Now, Melo is officially retired.
I want him to get hired as the news spokesperson for Tampax Tampons.
Name another player besides Westbrook, whose been responsible for stopping so much flowage.
We overcame election fraud this time because Hair Plugs Sniffer caused World War 3 with Russia.
500 zillion later, you’d think Zelensky could afford a new shirt.
Now, I know why they call them army fatigues.
If White Supremacy is the biggest terrorist threat in America, then Whoopie Goldberg is the new Chief Happiness Officer for Breitbart.
All the deep state sleaze that overthrew the will of our people, are white. But they were no match for Hershel Walker after Trump elected him as Attorney General.
The Georgian Bulldog knocks off their heads one by one in the 1st ever-televised MMA match outside the White House.
How many crunches do you think Joy Behar can do? Before she pukes out an unhuggable cunt alien in The Day Democracy Died.
Dana White wanted to call the event “Rumble In The Rose Garden.” But at this point, President Trump was done beating around the bush. That’s Louie’s job. So, President Trump named the one-night-only event “Hershel Walker vs. the Swamp Thing State.”
The pay-per-view event paid off our national debut and got our economy roaring again, ushering in a new era of energy independence because fracking is good, Lisa Simpson. Fracking reduces our C2 emissions. So, yes, Neil Young is full of shit too. Besides, our country’s addiction to Mountain Dew and Crystal Meth offsets our country’s low birth rates after the COVID vax did.
God bless Howard University and Puffy Daddy for making Biggie blow up bigger than Hillary after stress-eating herself to death in Gitmo like Pizza The Hut.
The USA has got its mojo back, Jimi Hendrix lives, Challah; thank you very much.
A hologram of Jimi Hendrix appears in front of a purple, red, white and blue because Jimi would want it that way, as the Star-Spangled Banner plays from Woodstock as we fade out, USA, USA, USA!
Michael Kornbluth
According to the Koran, Buraq is the winged horse that flew the honorable prophet Muhammad into Heaven after ascending past the steps of Mount Sinai. Did the ghost of Moses give the winged horse a lift on his magic carpet, signed by the Steve Miller Band?
In Farsi, Buraq also means “blessed”, with conquering the curse of white man’s disease, which is why Obama is a fake news blessed one, because I’ve never seen him slam anything, except alt-right dirt rags like Breitbart, that dared to point out how his social security card is from Connecticut, which is whiter than White Man’s Disease.
When Obama talks about race, everything changes. Then, why hasn’t Obama Be Good talked Netflix into making a black remake of Caddyshack yet? Biden plays the Van Wilder of Lifeguards. Hunter plays the burnout Groundskeeper who has found Zen in blow painting. Obama snorts up Chevy’s stash of white privilege and writes it off as a master’s estate tax. The My Pillow guy plays Rodney because Jackie Mason is too overtly annoying Jewy for Obama’s tastes. The My Pillow guy dies after Obama orders John Fetterman to smother him out with an oversized hoodie in exchange for a free Slurpee card from 711 for life. The movie ends with Obama running a go-cart over John Kerry’s bare feet on the back nine, playing golf with Matthew McConaughey. Obama yells, “I know; watch the pedicure, man. John is playing footsie with Saudi royals since his wife cut his weekly allowance in half for losing a kite surfing match to Fetterman; the only thing that moves slower than Fetterman is John Durham. So, I was born in Hell’s Gate in Keyna; what will you do about it America? MAGA country is dumb for thinking Bruce Springsteen will ever stop kissing my ass. But in Kenya, they know better than my kiss ass team at MSNBC. Gates tried putting me on a 500-dollar bill in Kenya, but the government declined. I’m so not money, and my fellow Kenyans know it.”
Hell’s Gate lives with a swingers twist, challah, thank you very much.
What’s the least politically incorrect reply to learning that someone you knew was friends with a pedophile?
Don’t act so surprised. Isn’t he a registered Democrat?
Who supports illegal entry no matter the cost.
And supporting open borders is supporting getaway rape speed, andele, andele, arriba, arriba.
Hair Plugs Sniffer in the White House is the demented, perverted umpire waiving all of MS-13 to steal home.
Only Frank Drummond from Police Squad would call them safe in an attempt to save the Queen.
But the Old G Queen is deader than claims of Prince Harry trying to kill himself over mental health issues.
Scruffy Archie hasn’t shaved in years.
Hell’s Gates lives, Challah, thank you very much.
Michael Kornbluth
Do It All Dad Year Season 6 debut, Jewish Jesus Lives.
How do Antifa foot soldiers for the DNC show love for Mom on Mother’s Day?
Take out the trash and move out of the house for good.
Yesterday I told my son. “Freedom of speech has its limitations. For example, you can get arrested for yelling fire in a crowded theater.”
Son says, “What if there’s only one person in the theater?”
I finish laughing and say, “And that one person is Christopher Wray in the FBI screening room jerking off with a handful of Paul Mitchell Mousse doing his best Beavis and Butthead impersonation yelling, “Fire, fire” while watching a mockumentary about ANTIFA written by Stephen King and Patton Oswalt called Fire Childs Gone Wild. Now that’s an idea.”
Fire Childs Gone Wild, Challah, thank you very much.
But diversity is our strength.
Or the latest hurler for Antifa wouldn’t require Tommy John Surgery next time he hurls a concrete milkshake at a journalist with a byline in the National Review.
Fire Childs Gone Wild, Challah, thank you very much.
Michael Kornbluth
At a parent-teacher conference for my son’s Kindergarten class, his Spanish Teacher implores us to bring Spanish to our home. I raise my hand and ask, “Isn’t one home invasion enough?”
When America winces, Challah, thank you very much.
Self-Defense is deader than Kyle Rittenhouse’s prospects during pledge week at the University of Arizona.
When America winces, Challah, thank you very much.
I wish toothpaste tasted more like Bud Light. So, I wouldn’t taste anything afterwards except Kid’s Rocks spurned tears.
When America winces, Challah, thank you very much.
Now Kid Rock can’t play beer pong with groupies on Spring Break in Daytona Beach without his gag reflex kicking in, to the image of a Dylan Hepburn finger popping American Badass from behind to Devil Without Cause?
When American winces, Challah, thank you very much.
10.8 million Tik Tock followers are ten times platinum. So, I’d lose my zest for pounding Bud Light on the front leg of my F Hair Plugs Sniffer Tour, Born free, my balls.
When America winces, Challah, thank you very much.
I’m guilty of wincing after asking Alexa how many followers Dylan Hepburn Mulvaney has on Tik Tok before
finishing that joke.
I didn’t wince because Dylan Mulvaney is trans. I winced because she’s hackier than John Mullaney’s act in Jerry Seinfeld’s Bar Mitzvah suit.
When America winces, Challah, thank you very much.
I also winced at the thought of how Dylan is the best American-made Trans talent Tik Tok offers these days. Our Chinese Overlords wouldn’t consider Dylan Hepburn Lady Boy gold material of any kind, especially since the price of the US dollar is more depressed than Trumpy Poo’s tits knowing that Operation Death Speed continues to cause more cases of cardiac arrest than torn condoms on Bill Maher’s party bus tour of Rio De Janeiro during Marti Gras, sponsored by Third Legged Beauties.com.
When America winces, Challah, thank you very much.
I bet Dylan Mulvaney isn’t even real, just a CIA-made, augmented reality version of what a trans influencer spokesperson for Bud Light would look like based on John Mulaney’s stool sample alone.
How is Dylan’s sex appeal alone generating 10 million followers on Tik Tok? It sounds more prosperous than John Mulaney selling out Madison Garden because he had the balls to after Seinfeld for a change. Cosby was a rapist for 4 decades in a row. Where happened to your powers of observation then Jerry?
When America winces, Challah, thank you very much.
Click Farms in India wince at padding Dylan’s numbers more than they did for the creep Swede in Succession.
When America winces, Challah, thank you very much.
Michael Kornbluth
At a parent-teacher conference for my son’s Kindergarten class, his Spanish Teacher implores us to bring Spanish to our home. I raise my hand and ask, “Isn’t one home invasion enough?”
When America winces, Challah, thank you very much.
Self-Defense is deader than Kyle Rittenhouse’s prospects during pledge week at the University of Arizona.
When America winces, Challah, thank you very much.
I wish toothpaste tasted more like Bud Light. So, I wouldn’t taste anything afterward except Kid’s Rocks spurned tears.
When America winces, Challah, thank you very much.
Now Kid Rock can’t play beer pong with groupies on Spring Break in Daytona Beach without his gag reflex kicking in to the image of a Dylan Hepburn finger popping American Badass from behind to Devil Without Cause?
When American winces, Challah, thank you very much.
10.8 million Tik Tock followers are ten times platinum. So, I’d lose my zest for pounding Bud Light on the front leg of my F Hair Plugs Sniffer Tour, Born free, my balls.
When America winces, Challah, thank you very much.
I’m guilty of wincing after asking Alexa how many followers Dylan Hepburn Mulvaney has on Tik Tok before finishing that joke.
I didn’t wince because Dylan Mulvaney is trans. I winced because she’s hackier than John Mullaney’s act in Jerry Seinfeld’s Bar Mitzvah suit.
When America winces, Challah, thank you very much.
I also winced at the thought of how Dylan is the best American-made Trans talent Tik Tok offers these days. Our Chinese Overlords wouldn’t consider Dyland Hepurn Lady Boy gold material of any kind, especially since the price of the US dollar is more depressed than Trumpy Poo’s tits knowing that Operation Death Speed continues to cause more cases of cardiac arrest than torn condoms on Bill Maher’s party bus tour of Rio De Janeiro during Marti Gras, sponsored by Third Legged Beauties.com.
When America winces, Challah, thank you very much.
I bet Dylan Mulvaney isn’t even real, just a CIA-made, augmented reality version of what a trans influencer spokesperson for Bud Light would look like based on John Mulaney’s stool sample alone.
How Dylan’s sex appeal alone is generate 10 million followers on Tik Tok? It sounds more prosperous than John Mulaney selling out Madison Garden because he had the balls to after Seinfeld for a change. Cosby was rapist for 4 decades in a row. What happened to your powers of observation then Jerry?
When America winces, Challah, thank you very much.
Click Farms in India wince at padding Dylan’s numbers more than they did for the creep Swede in Succession.
When America winces, Challah, thank you very much.
Michael Kornbluth
#ComedyRecord142HackerHero
Edward Snowden for President, not that elections matter anymore, Challah. Thank you very much.
#HackerHeroComedyRecord142
Killer Set:
Lazy Man Sex
Hacker Hero
Deplorable USA
Busty Beauties
Hounding Down Happiness
Asshole Resistance Gone
Fame Whore Ho
American Made Prayer
Do It All Dad Year Podcast Blog 