Has-Been Hack Attack

Tyler Perry will be restarting production at his Atlanta studio in July. Resist this Hollywood, have fun being under lock down longer than Portia de Rossi.

If I could do it all over again, I would’ve hired a wise black grandma to replace my no-show Jewish Grandma for my wedding. All I had to do was a post an ad on Craig’s List, “Tyler Perry impersonators are welcome, but you must be comfortable performing in front of white audiences only.”

This is an impersonation of me instructing my son on how to avoid antisemitic backlash at school for whipping out the Dreidel at school during next Christmas season, “Arthur, if the Dreidel lands on Gimmel, don’t say give me all your money because we control the Federal Reserve and all the banks in the North Pole to.”

Trump supporter shaming is so hot right now. It worked so well the last time. Now, the Democrats are freeing rapists and pedophiles to register with Central Casting and offer more gift bags in hopes they’ll vote for Mr. Groper.

Howard Stern ‘s brain has gone to mush, and he can’t blame it on drug abuse, which is even more pathetic. Or maybe, he wasn’t too pointed deep in the 1st place, especially after dropping lines such as, “Trump had disdains for his voters, he’s really a star fucker at heart. What he loves his celebrities, not Joe the Plumber. You mean the same shallow, self-centered celebrities, who never pay for drinks, who for 3 years have been pretending to care about the safety and financial well being of their fellow Americans, 64 million branded racists in particular, because all they’ve done is shit on them ad nauseam, in the hope of trying to shame them into thinking they’re the racist, deplorable, sexist, pieces of shit they’ve become for acting like any opinion contrasting this fake news bullshit forced, maxed out narrative, is worthy of sedition despite their fake news Obama resistor disciple heroes and media mouthpiece lickers, being the real conning, perpetrators of corrupt, encouraged, divisive lawlessness, you dumb, perv protecting, China licking mooks.

Howard Stern hates Trump supporters for voting for Trump because the big bad, blond wolf has rendered weird, weak Howard, irrelevant. Not that Howard was even the King of Social media in the 1st place. But Howard has to give lip service to his ghoulish, tranny conjuring wife to ensure Jimmy Kimmel keeps inviting perm head over to his house for more 2 bite chicken parm dinners.

Trump has disdain for his voters. Then, why does still your president, work 17-hour days for free, when Melania’s around to role play with and throw on her Spies Like Us Mink hat in the nude whenever he likes?

I feel like such a hack for ever being enamored with weird, weak Howard. Knowing Collin Quinn would admit to listening to his show every day never helped. Yeah, yeah, we’ve heard you’re semi famous Collin, for mumbling pro Bush sentiment on Tough Crowd, during W’s never-ending war against Terror as long as radical Islamists kept fucking.

Weird, weak Howard Stern doesn’t hate Trump supporters, he hates how stupid they are for not siding with the party of Rape Wood, sanctuary cities and Hillary Hammer Time Cankles. And after all these years I thought Jackie the Joke Man was the most overpaid hack on the planet.

Side note, any self-admitted Republican gal, pre-Trump who takes offense at a Hillary Hammer Time Cankles reference, because they have “cankles to”, weren’t blessed with the chosen, funny Jew bone for a reason.

Memo to random Breitbart commentator, Christians name drop Jesus way more than your average loudmouth American Jew references his Jewish identity, and fuck you for insisting those proud Hebrews you do know in Ford country in Detroit allegedly, prefer to mind their business and just blend in like ham and cheese sandwiches at my kid’s elementary school, which never went out of style. Then again the ham and cheese sandwich never had a style.

I’m tired about hearing about what slave’s Hasidic woman are. They got Torah, huge families to lean on for company, including their fifty million kids, and Instant Pot cooker’s today to reduce their brisket cooking time by 8000 hours. Hindu’s have arranged marriages and didn’t Muhammad preach the practice of marrying kid wives? Knowing Muhammad’s follower’s fascination with virgins, you’d think the suicide bombing killing ones, ascending up to Allah’s virgin heaven allegedly, had enough blood on their hands already.

The enemy is the virus. I thought it was the army of the east who intentionally walled off Wuhan but allowed all outgoing flights to Milan because of their essential silk robe selling business.

Enough with scapegoating China. If they’re as pure as snow, then why is China resisting investigations into their handling of the Coronavirus more than Aquafresh?

Where’s Eminem these days? He doesn’t have any more Trump Nazi raps to share? Despite Trump lifting the lifetime ban on Jewish membership after he bought Mar-A-Lago, Slim on Facts Shady.

Michael Kornbluth

Pretend Original Provocateurs

Tyler Perry will be restarting production at his Atlanta studio in July. Resist this Hollywood, have fun being under lock down longer than Portia de Rossi.

If I could do it all over again, I would’ve hired a wise black grandma to replace my no-show Jewish Grandma for my wedding. All I had to do was a post an ad on Craig’s List, “Tyler Perry impersonators are welcome, but you must be comfortable performing in front of white audiences only.”

This is an impersonation of me instructing my son on how to avoid antisemitic backlash at school for whipping out the Dreidel at school during next Christmas season, “Arthur, if the Dreidel lands on Gimmel, don’t say give me all your money because we control the Federal Reserve and all the banks in the North Pole to.”

Trump supporter shaming is so hot right now. It worked so well the last time. Now, the Democrats are freeing rapists and pedophiles to register with Central Casting and offer more gift bags in hopes they’ll vote for Mr. Groper.

Howard Stern ‘s brain has gone to mush, and he can’t blame it on drug abuse, which is even more pathetic. Or maybe, he wasn’t too pointed deep in the 1st place, especially after dropping lines such as, “Trump had disdains for his voters, he’s really a star fucker at heart. What he loves his celebrities, not Joe the Plumber. You mean the same shallow, self-centered celebrities, who never pay for drinks, who for 3 years have been pretending to care about the safety and financial well being of their fellow Americans, 64 million branded racists in particular, because all they’ve done is shit on them ad nauseam, in the hope of trying to shame them into thinking they’re the racist, deplorable, sexist, pieces of shit they’ve become for acting like any opinion contrasting this fake news bullshit forced, maxed out narrative, is worthy of sedition despite their fake news Obama resistor disciple heroes and media mouthpiece lickers, being the real conning, perpetrators of corrupt, encouraged, divisive lawlessness, you dumb, perv protecting, China licking mooks.

Howard Stern hates Trump supporters for voting for Trump because the big bad, blond wolf has rendered weird, weak Howard, irrelevant. Not that Howard was even the King of Social media in the 1st place. But Howard has to give lip service to his ghoulish, tranny conjuring wife to ensure Jimmy Kimmel keeps inviting perm head over to his house for more 2 bite chicken parm dinners.

Trump has disdain for his voters. Then, why does still your president, work 17-hour days for free, when Melania’s around to role play with and throw on her Spies Like Us Mink hat in the nude whenever he likes?

I feel like such a hack for ever being enamored with weird, weak Howard. Knowing Collin Quinn would admit to listening to his show every day never helped. Yeah, yeah, we’ve heard you’re semi famous Collin, for mumbling pro Bush sentiment on Tough Crowd, during W’s never-ending war against Terror as long as radical Islamists kept fucking.

Weird, weak Howard Stern doesn’t hate Trump supporters, he hates how stupid they are for not siding with the party of Rape Wood, sanctuary cities and Hillary Hammer Time Cankles. And after all these years I thought Jackie the Joke Man was the most overpaid hack on the planet.

Side note, any self-admitted Republican gal, pre-Trump who takes offense at a Hillary Hammer Time Cankles reference, because they have “cankles to”, weren’t blessed with the chosen, funny Jew bone for a reason.

Memo to random Breitbart commentator, Christians name drop Jesus way more than your average loudmouth American Jew references his Jewish identity, and fuck you for insisting those proud Hebrews you do know in Ford country in Detroit allegedly, prefer to mind their business and just blend in like ham and cheese sandwiches at my kid’s elementary school, which never went out of style. Then again the ham and cheese sandwich never had a style.

I’m tired about hearing about what slave’s Hasidic woman are. They got Torah, huge families to lean on for company, including their fifty million kids, and Instant Pot cooker’s today to reduce their brisket cooking time by 8000 hours. Hindu’s have arranged marriages and didn’t Muhammad preach the practice of marrying kid wives? Knowing Muhammad’s follower’s fascination with virgins, you’d think the suicide bombing killing ones, ascending up to Allah’s virgin heaven allegedly, had enough blood on their hands already.

The enemy is the virus. I thought it was the army of the east who intentionally walled off Wuhan but allowed all outgoing flights to Milan because of their essential silk robe selling business.

Enough with scapegoating China. If they’re as pure as snow, then why is China resisting investigations into their handling of the Coronavirus more than Aquafresh?

Where’s Eminem these days? He doesn’t have any more Trump Nazi raps to share? Despite Trump lifting the lifetime ban on Jewish membership after he bought Mar-A-Lago, Slim on Facts Shady.

Pretend Original Provocateurs

Tyler Perry will be restarting production at his Atlanta studio in July. Resist this Hollywood, have fun being under lock down longer than Portia de Rossi.

If I could do it all over again, I would’ve hired a wise black grandma to replace my no-show Jewish Grandma for my wedding. All I had to do was a post an ad on Craig’s List, “Tyler Perry impersonators are welcome, but you must be comfortable performing in front of white audiences only.”

This is an impersonation of me instructing my son on how to avoid antisemitic backlash at school for whipping out the Dreidel at school during next Christmas season, “Arthur, if the Dreidel lands on Gimmel, don’t say give me all your money because we control the Federal Reserve and all the banks in the North Pole to.”

Trump supporter shaming is so hot right now. It worked so well the last time. Now, the Democrats are freeing rapists and pedophiles to register with Central Casting and offer more gift bags in hopes they’ll vote for Mr. Groper.

Howard Stern ‘s brain has gone to mush, and he can’t blame it on drug abuse, which is even more pathetic. Or maybe, he wasn’t too pointed deep in the 1st place, especially after dropping lines such as, “Trump had disdains for his voters, he’s really a star fucker at heart. What he loves his celebrities, not Joe the Plumber. You mean the same shallow, self-centered celebrities, who never pay for drinks, who for 3 years have been pretending to care about the safety and financial well being of their fellow Americans, 64 million branded racists in particular, because all they’ve done is shit on them ad nauseam, in the hope of trying to shame them into thinking they’re the racist, deplorable, sexist, pieces of shit they’ve become for acting like any opinion contrasting this fake news bullshit forced, maxed out narrative, is worthy of sedition despite their fake news Obama resistor disciple heroes and media mouthpiece lickers, being the real conning, perpetrators of corrupt, encouraged, divisive lawlessness, you dumb, perv protecting, China licking mooks.

Howard Stern hates Trump supporters for voting for Trump because the big bad, blond wolf has rendered weird, weak Howard, irrelevant. Not that Howard was even the King of Social media in the 1st place. But Howard has to give lip service to his ghoulish, tranny conjuring wife to ensure Jimmy Kimmel keeps inviting perm head over to his house for more 2 bite chicken parm dinners.

Trump has disdain for his voters. Then, why does still your president, work 17-hour days for free, when Melania’s around to role play with and throw on her Spies Like Us Mink hat in the nude whenever he likes?

I feel like such a hack for ever being enamored with weird, weak Howard. Knowing Collin Quinn would admit to listening to his show every day never helped. Yeah, yeah, we’ve heard you’re semi famous Collin, for mumbling pro Bush sentiment on Tough Crowd, during W’s never-ending war against Terror as long as radical Islamists keep fucking.

Weird, weak Howard Stern doesn’t hate Trump supporters, he hates how stupid they are for not siding with the party of Rape Wood, sanctuary cities and Hillary Hammer Time Cankles. And after all these years I thought Jackie the Joke Man was the most overpaid hack on the planet.

Side note, any self-admitted Republican gal, pre-Trump who takes offense at a Hillary Hammer Time Cankles reference, because they have “cankles to”, weren’t blessed with the chosen, funny Jew bone for a reason.

Memo to random Breitbart commentator, Christians name drop Jesus way more than your average loudmouth American Jew references his Jewish identity, and fuck you for insisting those proud Hebrews you do know in Ford country in Detroit allegedly, prefer to mind their business and just blend in like ham and cheese sandwiches at my kid’s elementary school, which never went out of style. Then again the ham and cheese sandwich never had a style.

I’m tired about hearing about what slave’s Hasidic woman are. They got Torah, huge families to lean on for company, including their fifty million kids, and Instant Pot cooker’s today to reduce their brisket cooking time by 8000 hours. Hindu’s have arranged marriages and didn’t Muhammad preach the practice of marrying kid wives? Knowing Muhammad’s follower’s fascination with virgins, you’d think the suicide bombing killing ones, ascending up to Allah’s virgin heaven allegedly, had enough blood on their hands already.

The enemy is the virus. I thought it was the army of the east who intentionally walled off Wuhan but allowed all outgoing flights to Milan because of their essential silk robe selling business.

Enough with scapegoating China. If they’re as pure as snow, then why is China resisting investigations into their handling of the Coronavirus more than Aquafresh?

Where’s Eminem these days? He doesn’t have any more Trump Nazi raps to share? Despite Trump lifting the lifetime ban on Jewish membership after he bought Mar-A-Lago, Slim on Facts Shady.

Michael Kornbluth

Fuck Face Fauci

Fuck Face Fauci says kids might not be able to safely return to school in the fall because a vaccine isn’t developed yet. Call me crazy, but I don’t see Bill Gates sweating it. What are Fuck Face Fauci’s accomplishments again? Besides being a head financier of the Wuhan Lab, China’s gimp in Armani, main new accelerator of Trump Derangement Syndrome, bat shit crazy, wet market conspiracist, Tiger King’s ass plug if he ever get’s out of the slammer through executive order by Trump, just for shits and giggles. After Trump ensures Tiger King makes amends and makes him a DEA agent to go under cover and bust every crystal meth kiddie porno ring throughout Nebraska and Oklahoma sooner than later.

Fuck Face Fauci doesn’t think our kids will be able to start school again in the Fall. Doesn’t this little Gnocchi realize the DOJ is unmasking all the Obama administration traitors who illegally spied on Trump’s campaign, framed his NSA advisor Flynn and have Durham on their tail with criminal indictments up the wazoo for lying about being. blissfully unaware about their bullshit Russian collusion investigation with less legs than Lieutenant Dan? Well, duh, he’s buying time for Obama to brush up on his native Kenyan.

Like Fuck Face Fauci gives a shit about the safety of children. He owns a pharma company with Bill Gates but Bill Gates’s Dad headed Planned Parenthood, responsible for the death of more ages of innocence than Rob Reiner’s open casting calls for Stand By Me.

I’ve done some homeschooling on my own, including today. But am I asking too much of my kids’ teacher to dress up for their morning message video? It’s not like they’re wearing no makeup, but the Velour jumpsuit is in poor taste and doesn’t scream, in it to win it, unless you’re the sloppy third Kardashian sister, who get’s away with it, but not really. Aren’t my kids teachers still getting paid in full? For posting a daily 2-minute message every morning, that’s normally them piggy backing off something trending on Twitter. Like what’s special about today? That’s right, it’s Star Wars Day. Twitter for elementary school teachers today is the new cliff notes.

No school for a year. Good, I’ll be able to write Do It All Dad Does Home Hebrew Schooling, teach my kids how to speak fluent Hebrew and leave open the possibility of me seducing an Israeli super model to make sure Mama remains on her best behavior.

Go ask China is racist? Did Trump ask the reporter to ask China why Jet Lee’s voice always sounds like he got kicked into he nuts one too many times by Lucy Lui?

These days, Bitcoin is worth less than Chelsea Handler’s tits sagging popularity.

Fuck face Fauci says it’s cavalier to think children are immune to the Corona Virus. Spoiled, whiny bitches like Chris Cuomo don’t count?

Got to love Bryan Adams freaking out on Instagram about Wet Markets for ruining his planned performance at Royal Albert Hall tonight, because he hasn’t had hit since Meg Ryan fucked up her face.

Also, any message on Instagram starting with, “It’s been great hanging out with my family, BUT”, means I’m not as Richard Marx sappy as you think.

Michael Kornbluth

Chosen People My Ass

 

Bill DeBlasio couldn’t believe his eyes. A group of Hasidic Jews mourned a rabbi in the streets of Brooklyn, covering their faces like any good Muslim housewife would do or else dramatically lessen the probability of hiding the shiner infringe upon her scurrying eyes whenever his property is allowed outside the house to stand on line for the Hallall Guys Truck when the coast is clear again.

“The Jewish community is one that I love”, Bill DeBlasio says. Then, why would you devalue the Holocaust by comparing Trump to Hitler? Trump’s Hitler in what, Inglorious Bastards 2? Get a grip putz breath, sequels never live up to the original.

DeBlasio has no regrets for singling out the Jews for showing their respect to a religious scholar, who didn’t rape, torture and murder in the name of you know who, unlike the piece of shit, number 2 in command of ISIS, just immortalized in the Washington Post as a religious scholar. And Judd Apatow is the Chief Happiness Officer for Breitbart. Religious scholar, actually he was a virgin selling con artist loser, who couldn’t get sucked off in a Chicago bathhouse for Arafat appreciation month.

Michael Kornbluth

 

Sucking Off Scientists

 

Let the scientists lead. Make some CIA approved designer acid and drop it the water coolers at CNN and will really see Brain Stelter cry for forgiveness for absolving China of all evil doing in front of his maker.

Trump ignored the scientists. Which scientist, exactly, Jeff Fucking Goldblum in the a remake of the Fly, where Steve O tempts him to eat bat soup in one of his cloning experiments with Count fucking Dracula cereal made in China?

I’m so tired of the left propping up Scientists like Gods as they frame still your President Trump as the bible humping hick from Appalachia, who refuses to acknowledge logic or reason. Scientists aren’t kicking MS-13 out of your neighborhood either.

Let the scientists lead, yeah to follow the pay off money trail back to Great Wall to remain hush, hush about the super organized, never sketchy, always honest, intellectual property theft is their middle name Chinese.

Enough with Trump ignored the scientists. It’s not Quantum Physics, China spreads virus, locks it’s citizens at home with crow bars yet intentionally downplays the severity of it’s biochemical warfare, insisting, “It ain’t nothing but a duck wing on string.

Scientists should lead, not Trump. Why not let non-elected Political Scientists who have Ann Coulter sign their bibles to get them in the mood to debate chaos theory in relation to open borders and her PMS flaring next time Israel is mentioned during Trump’s SOTU.

Blaming China does no good. It only hurts the hand that feeds us says CNN, Apple, Facebook, the NBA, Microsoft, Hunter Biden’s cocaine slush fund provider.

Let the Scientists lead. What are the Scientists going to do? Besides, not locate a big dipper between President’s Zi’s zipper made in China.

This constant scientist suck off feast has to stop. Wife pitches me a scientifically proven, guided meditation to unclog my Chakras she heard on NPR. I say, “Does Bill Gates do it? Because siding with China isn’t achieving higher consciousness babe.”

Michael Kornbluth

Can’t Enough Of Social Distancing

No more Indian woman on the cover of Land O’ Lakes. How much can you scalp a Land O’ Lakes carton of butter in my parents fridge from 86? I have a bookie friend who used to sell peyote to Craig Carton, who’d like to know.

Just when I think my wife is beyond annoying lately, my younger brother’s wife got her beat. Her take on GI Joe action figures. They’re so nationalistic. My parents were pacifists. So they don’t consider ANTIFA Punisher wannabes as forces of good?

Religious fanatics on the right and atheist coastal elitists all suck and ruin dinner parties for everybody. But nobody highlights this undeniable positive result of social distancing. New Chelsea Handler tit pics don’t count.
I’m regretting hiring my younger brother’s wife to teach my kids since the #coronavirus hit. I don’t care if I finished my Great American Jew Novel already. I have to endure, so what else are you doing for your birthday besides getting your kids gifts?

Brother’s tutor wife driving me crazy again. Bush is the reason why you never hear about trade schools in high school. Yeah, I don’t recall Obama sucking off Joe the Plumber either.

It’s only been 1 month for those working from home yet parents who normally work in an office away from their kids all day couldn’t be more restless. Are your kids that much more horrible than you are? Is that Trump’s fault to?
My son’s Kindergarten video teacher conference taking an ugly dark turn. Do you have anything to share Arthur? My dad hates Disney because they own ABC and did everything in their power to discredit #Pizzagate. You should’ve backed off bitch.

#RIPHowardFinkel

He was a permanent fixture of my youth and heir apparent to Mean Gene, minus the whiskey marinated voice. What a storied, action packed career, who had been everywhere man. Sleep tight maestro of the play by play mike.

Give a birthday card or shut the fuck up. So you’re just getting your kids a bunch of gifts for your birthday? I gave myself the month of April to write the Great American Jew Novel to shame my gentile in-laws for force feeding Eucharist on my kids, which is big.

Michael Kornbluth

Batshit Nancy

My mom insists she’ll be coming back to NY to see her 3 grandchildren back east in June. Hold on Mom, are you telling me Dad is annoying you at home that much? To just throw caution to the wind and say, “Fuck it, Trump’s going to win anyway.”

Trump took insufficient action denture breath Pelosi? When he issued a travel ban on China, you were too busy stocking up on Chunky Monkey, you China slobbering whore. James Corden has more self-respect in the mirror than you bat shit crazy bitch.
Where were these genius Scientists calling fake news bullshit on China for claiming the #cornoravirusus wasn’t contagious through human transmission? Let me guess, sucking off the fart fumes of Obama’s legacy of sucking off atheist hero Stephen Hawking.
What #cornoravirus warnings did Trump ignore again? Wasn’t it Bird Brain DelBlasio while fumling with his chopsticks in Chinatown who told New Yorkers to get a grip? Even a showy putz like Ed Koch could hold on to chopsticks for the cameras.
Learned from my wife about Bill and Hillary dropping off Pizzas at her hospital during the #CornavirusOutbreak. No sushi, Hammer Time Cankles? With your pay to play charity foundation kaput, it’s hard to play the elitist Robin Hood of Westchester County, huh?
Everything with the Democrats today is life and death. Under Obama’s so called leadership, ISIS ran wild and he nuke gifted Iran 150 billion on his way out the door. But Biden being chummy with #coronachina should put American’s security concerns at ease.

Siding with China is siding with the Nazi’s, Bloomberg, CNN and every piece of shit US senator who blames the 10,000 deaths of my fellow New Yorkers so far on Trump’s racist travel bans, shipped hospital beds and pushed for financial relief checks, you feckless cunts.
Blaming Trump for the #CoronavirusOutbreak is like blaming Warren Beatty for giving Aids to the Monkeys.

Fuck anyone whose collecting a paycheck from home, reduced or not. Getting to spend quality, bonding time with their kids, who still bitch about “civic duty” to their so called friends, who must hustle outside the home to pay their rent, you ungrateful cunt breaths.

Michael Kornbluth

The Virtual Sedar From Hell

Memo to

Any reader who got their panties in a bunch over the less than 2 seconds, non-steamy female on female kiss among the 2 reunited school librarian looking rebels on planet Endor in The Rise of Skywalker is a joyless douche incarnate.

Trump’s the Anti-Christ? But in the Bible part 2, Jesus returns to defeat him. So have some faith in the Jesus comeback story, won’t you people.

Anyone read any thought leadership posts on LinkedIn today about the low probability of Jews killing Jesus, knowing most avoid tool boxes full of hammers and nails like Trump Rallies on Fox News?

But seriously, have any thought leaders on LinkedIn today gposted any theories on the low probability of the Jews killing Jesus because Roman rulers catered less to heckling mobs than Chinese hate speech ambassadors for the NBA?

Anyone watch the virtual Passover Sedar hosted by Jason Alexander? Did he play the Jewish slave afflicted from being typecast as the bumbling putz on Seinfeld until he became liberated as the chosen celeb has-been resistor for hire?

It’s hard to feel sweet, fluffy and heavenly on Easter Sunday, after learning how your mother-in-law, force fed your son Eucharist in attempt to win heaven granting props because he was never baptized.

My wife insists if my 3 year old son doesn’t start brushing his teeth now, he’ll grow to get dentures. Can’t he just get his teeth airbrushed like Courtney Love, did before she became a junkie in the Case Against Larry Flynt? I don’t get it.

You have to question Prince Harry’s parenting instincts for naming his son Archie. Was Jughead not Transfluid enough? Also, raising your son in Bel Air as the new Fresh Prince is too much on the nose as they say in the biz.
A positive from the #coronavirus is the comic relief offered on LinkedIn from anyone who works in advertising, insisting they’re still working and hiring so called talent to prop up Collin Kaepernick’s net worth or NBA social justice activism.

My younger brother really is brain dead. He says, “Why would you give your daughter an HPV vaccination shot?” I say, “Because it makes her immune from dying of cervical cancer, if left untreated, which they don’t teach in Hebrew School, reformed or not.”

Michael Kornbluth