Pretend Original Provocateurs

Tyler Perry will be restarting production at his Atlanta studio in July. Resist this Hollywood, have fun being under lock down longer than Portia de Rossi.

If I could do it all over again, I would’ve hired a wise black grandma to replace my no-show Jewish Grandma for my wedding. All I had to do was a post an ad on Craig’s List, “Tyler Perry impersonators are welcome, but you must be comfortable performing in front of white audiences only.”

This is an impersonation of me instructing my son on how to avoid antisemitic backlash at school for whipping out the Dreidel at school during next Christmas season, “Arthur, if the Dreidel lands on Gimmel, don’t say give me all your money because we control the Federal Reserve and all the banks in the North Pole to.”

Trump supporter shaming is so hot right now. It worked so well the last time. Now, the Democrats are freeing rapists and pedophiles to register with Central Casting and offer more gift bags in hopes they’ll vote for Mr. Groper.

Howard Stern ‘s brain has gone to mush, and he can’t blame it on drug abuse, which is even more pathetic. Or maybe, he wasn’t too pointed deep in the 1st place, especially after dropping lines such as, “Trump had disdains for his voters, he’s really a star fucker at heart. What he loves his celebrities, not Joe the Plumber. You mean the same shallow, self-centered celebrities, who never pay for drinks, who for 3 years have been pretending to care about the safety and financial well being of their fellow Americans, 64 million branded racists in particular, because all they’ve done is shit on them ad nauseam, in the hope of trying to shame them into thinking they’re the racist, deplorable, sexist, pieces of shit they’ve become for acting like any opinion contrasting this fake news bullshit forced, maxed out narrative, is worthy of sedition despite their fake news Obama resistor disciple heroes and media mouthpiece lickers, being the real conning, perpetrators of corrupt, encouraged, divisive lawlessness, you dumb, perv protecting, China licking mooks.

Howard Stern hates Trump supporters for voting for Trump because the big bad, blond wolf has rendered weird, weak Howard, irrelevant. Not that Howard was even the King of Social media in the 1st place. But Howard has to give lip service to his ghoulish, tranny conjuring wife to ensure Jimmy Kimmel keeps inviting perm head over to his house for more 2 bite chicken parm dinners.

Trump has disdain for his voters. Then, why does still your president, work 17-hour days for free, when Melania’s around to role play with and throw on her Spies Like Us Mink hat in the nude whenever he likes?

I feel like such a hack for ever being enamored with weird, weak Howard. Knowing Collin Quinn would admit to listening to his show every day never helped. Yeah, yeah, we’ve heard you’re semi famous Collin, for mumbling pro Bush sentiment on Tough Crowd, during W’s never-ending war against Terror as long as radical Islamists kept fucking.

Weird, weak Howard Stern doesn’t hate Trump supporters, he hates how stupid they are for not siding with the party of Rape Wood, sanctuary cities and Hillary Hammer Time Cankles. And after all these years I thought Jackie the Joke Man was the most overpaid hack on the planet.

Side note, any self-admitted Republican gal, pre-Trump who takes offense at a Hillary Hammer Time Cankles reference, because they have “cankles to”, weren’t blessed with the chosen, funny Jew bone for a reason.

Memo to random Breitbart commentator, Christians name drop Jesus way more than your average loudmouth American Jew references his Jewish identity, and fuck you for insisting those proud Hebrews you do know in Ford country in Detroit allegedly, prefer to mind their business and just blend in like ham and cheese sandwiches at my kid’s elementary school, which never went out of style. Then again the ham and cheese sandwich never had a style.

I’m tired about hearing about what slave’s Hasidic woman are. They got Torah, huge families to lean on for company, including their fifty million kids, and Instant Pot cooker’s today to reduce their brisket cooking time by 8000 hours. Hindu’s have arranged marriages and didn’t Muhammad preach the practice of marrying kid wives? Knowing Muhammad’s follower’s fascination with virgins, you’d think the suicide bombing killing ones, ascending up to Allah’s virgin heaven allegedly, had enough blood on their hands already.

The enemy is the virus. I thought it was the army of the east who intentionally walled off Wuhan but allowed all outgoing flights to Milan because of their essential silk robe selling business.

Enough with scapegoating China. If they’re as pure as snow, then why is China resisting investigations into their handling of the Coronavirus more than Aquafresh?

Where’s Eminem these days? He doesn’t have any more Trump Nazi raps to share? Despite Trump lifting the lifetime ban on Jewish membership after he bought Mar-A-Lago, Slim on Facts Shady.

Batshit Nancy

My mom insists she’ll be coming back to NY to see her 3 grandchildren back east in June. Hold on Mom, are you telling me Dad is annoying you at home that much? To just throw caution to the wind and say, “Fuck it, Trump’s going to win anyway.”

Trump took insufficient action denture breath Pelosi? When he issued a travel ban on China, you were too busy stocking up on Chunky Monkey, you China slobbering whore. James Corden has more self-respect in the mirror than you bat shit crazy bitch.
Where were these genius Scientists calling fake news bullshit on China for claiming the #cornoravirusus wasn’t contagious through human transmission? Let me guess, sucking off the fart fumes of Obama’s legacy of sucking off atheist hero Stephen Hawking.
What #cornoravirus warnings did Trump ignore again? Wasn’t it Bird Brain DelBlasio while fumling with his chopsticks in Chinatown who told New Yorkers to get a grip? Even a showy putz like Ed Koch could hold on to chopsticks for the cameras.
Learned from my wife about Bill and Hillary dropping off Pizzas at her hospital during the #CornavirusOutbreak. No sushi, Hammer Time Cankles? With your pay to play charity foundation kaput, it’s hard to play the elitist Robin Hood of Westchester County, huh?
Everything with the Democrats today is life and death. Under Obama’s so called leadership, ISIS ran wild and he nuke gifted Iran 150 billion on his way out the door. But Biden being chummy with #coronachina should put American’s security concerns at ease.

Siding with China is siding with the Nazi’s, Bloomberg, CNN and every piece of shit US senator who blames the 10,000 deaths of my fellow New Yorkers so far on Trump’s racist travel bans, shipped hospital beds and pushed for financial relief checks, you feckless cunts.
Blaming Trump for the #CoronavirusOutbreak is like blaming Warren Beatty for giving Aids to the Monkeys.

Fuck anyone whose collecting a paycheck from home, reduced or not. Getting to spend quality, bonding time with their kids, who still bitch about “civic duty” to their so called friends, who must hustle outside the home to pay their rent, you ungrateful cunt breaths.

Michael Kornbluth