Why should Dads care about being funnier around their kids?
Because like Victor Borge, famous humorist, entertainer once prophesied, “Laughter is the shortest distance between 2 people.” But laughter between father and son, father and daughter reigns love supreme. John Coltrane lives. So, get closer to your kids though making them laugh already. The roots of your bondage long term depend on it.
Grow tighter with your kids with a tight 5. Meaning, it takes years to develop five minutes of material for most, so get cracking.
Use Your Kids Like an Open Mike.
Be the first to sign on the list.
Open up with your strongest material.
Keep it loose enough to improvise.
Close with PG-13 material and start making out with my daughter’s stuffed animal Pineapple Pretty. Just so my kid can do their half of the routine. How dare you kiss Pineapple Pretty? I didn’t get the impression she was asking for it. No more Pineapple Pretty for you Daddy, sorry.
Unspoken truth about why kids have miserable childhoods.
Late bloomers feel tripped up from the starting gate.
New insight into a familiar situation.
Kids are socially awkward today because they only talk in half sentences in real life.
Description of my talk about what sparks joy.
The Joy of Killing is about the importance of making your kids laugh.
The Joy of Killing is about what joy is sparked from making your kids laugh 4 minutes a day.
Bombing at Parenting is about losing the room meaning loss of interest from the audience giving a shit about your one second longer than they want to anymore.
Funnier dad, happier baby is about how much happier my baby is because I work harder at being funnier than just husband, that’s all.
Do It All Dads Home School Boy, is about refusing to outsource the totality of your kid’s education to a liberal hack professor who never made a cold call in the real world in her life.
Hot For Funnier Teachers is about kids being motivated to learn more by funnier teachers who relax them in class and make them feel less self-conscious, by laughing in unison at funnier teachers, long time.
Do It All Dads Matter is about dads being huge scene stealers.
Controlling My Kids With Comedy is my parenting philosophy practice, that’s resulted in my 3 kids being fuss free, most of the time, nobody’s perfect.
Use Your Kids Like Open Mikes is about making the most of your stage time with your kids at home, as limited as it is. Like they say in Woody Allen’s classic, Broadway Danny Rose, pre-Soon-Ye, always open big.
Children Are Better Than You, is about how children are better than you, especially, when you’re an emotionally, fragile prick.
The Power of Because is about developing your kids’ expression might and getting closer to finishing line of funny by filling in the blank following because. Fore example, pussy grabbing eluded Al Franken because he’s only 4 foot 2.
Never underestimate the comedic oomph of dad coined nicknames for his kids. They’ll love you long time for it, forevermore.
Bossing Through Kidding is about how kids want to be led by funnier teachers, Sam Kinison in Back To School, excluded.
LaVar Ball and Mr. Rogers go to a bar.
Mr. Rogers says, “You got baller wear, for my cracker footed ass?”
Evidence to support my idea of what killing your kids with laughter is the ultimate love supreme act of giving, to touch their inner depths of the soul like no, other, or maybe that’s the Super Shiva talking.
“How much love inside a friend? Depends on how much you give them.”
“Let woman out of the home, let men into it. Should be the aim of education.”
Pearl S. Buck
Too tired to be funny around your kids. I used to cold call 9 hours a day, and still find time to write jokes after work and fit in open mikes, before I had 3 kids out of nowhere, you can handle it.
Calls To Action
Make your home the happiest place on earth.
Personalize stuffed animals.
Talk to your kids like grown up comedians, seeking in their input on new material.
Use your kids like open mikes.
Include your kids in adult conversations.
Use the power of because.
Brainstorm nicknames, talk them out together, teaching your kids, sometimes the 4th idea is the strongest.
Yuck it up at home with your kids more.
Make home do it all dad time.
Talking down to your kids repel.
What’s awful and make it silly?
Your own dad questioning you’re desire to hang out again.
I chose our father means I was never that attached to you compared to your brother after all.
Chose laughs over silence.
Getting your kids to laugh more is good.
A sense of humor is a sign of strong, resilient, barely living on his wits freak.
Don’t play ISO ball like a flow sucking Carmelo Anthony.
Depriving joy makes you evil dude.
Stop outsourcing your kid’s entertainment.
Stop treating your kids like sloppy seconds
Rant like candy more, dictate less.
That’s it for now.
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