All Lives Matter is the new n word.
Imagine JJ Redick wearing an All-Lives Matter pin on ESPN during March Madness?
Later that evening, his wife says, “The alt-right comb over has to go dear.”
JJ Redick says, “Fine, but Christian Laettner’s tattoo on my ass stays.
He’s the only college player that played on the only Dream Team that matters before Magic made HIV disappear.
He’s only regarded as the most consistently clutch player in NCAA history who won one more national championship than Air Jordan did before he shamed Scottie Pippen on the Last Dance doc for delaying knee surgery as a salary negotiating tactic for getting paid less than BJ Armstrong’s nanny.
And Jordan had Big Game James worthy over Grant Hill.
Wife says, “Big game Worthy. Then, why did Worthy have to pay for it then?
JJ Redick replies, “I don’t know, cause Magic hogged up all the Laker girls between periods.
Did you know Christian Laettner has the most points scored in NCAA tournament history?
Wife says, “So?”
JJ Redick says, “So All American big men from Upstate New York with polish ancestry and a flawless midrange shooting game matter to dear, any dumb ass Polack who supports thugs’ lives matter most gets that.
And you wonder why Christian Laettner is the most hated player in NCAA history. It’s because he’s the most clutch foul shooter in college basketball history while attending the Harvard of the South doing his best Tom Brady impression before Tom Brady was fucking Tom Brady in New England. But guaranteed money in the NBA regardless of having a decent hook shot with your left is so oppressive.”
Michael Kornbluth
Phew, Dave Chappelle is done comparing Bruce Jenner changing his name to
what Ali did 50 years before all lives matter become the new n word. What, a
relief. Maybe now, Dave will show a smidgen of self-corrective awareness, and
not be so ready to defend R. Kelly in his act anymore by calling him the black
Elvis with weak bladder control. Also, Bruce Jenner was never asexual. But I
bet Bruce stayed harder longer, after he convinced wife Kris Jenner to cut her
short, so she would look more like a dolled-up Ralph Macchio, before Chelsea
Handler came out as a full-time social justice activist to detract the online
world from her tit’s sagging popularity. Oh yeah, let’s not forget Dave
Chappelle’s alleged brilliance in implying that Rihanna got what was coming to her,
because her big ass forehead was bound to get in the way of another Chris Brown
roundhouse again. The race defender supremacist supreme wrote off the kids at
the Never Land Ranch as transient pubescent fame whores who went into the
sleepover wanting more than an autograph. How did the wannabe smart, poignant
deep Paul Mooney 2.0 excuse Michael Jackson for murdering one age of innocence
after another like a smooth criminal? Dave Chappelle said what in Michael
Jackson’s defense again, “All the Beatles royalty points in the world,
can’t buy me love.” Did Chappelle ever impersonate Marlon Brando’s shrink
part in Don Juan De Marco and say, “Michael, just because it happened at
the Neverland Ranch, doesn’t mean it never happened Michael.” Hey
Chappelle, instead of making more Trans jokes, nobody gives a shit about, which
requires 0.0 bravery, when you’re not Jim Norton expressing your actual sexual
attraction toward one on thridlegs.com for the welcome 0.0 body fat around
their waists for a change. Why not use your keeping it real cultural cache with
Jeff Bezos and suggest he’d hook up Monique with some voice over work and make
her the new voice of Alexa because your benefactor at Netflix won’t hook up
large and in charge woman with comedy specials because of charges of racism,
which is precious, despite them dumping mo money into Chris Rock’s next
special, Kill Whitey Already, than what American taxpayers will spend on the
new Infrastructure Deal to pay for the reconstruction of Hunter’s deviated
septum. Unfortunately, you can no longer pay the past great Chris Rock with
just one rib. So, team up with your boy Kayne and campaign for Jeff Bezos to
make Monique the new voice of Alexa to prove Amazon really cares about
promoting diverse voices besides still making Mein Kampf available on Kindle,
which is 725 pages of hate speech in a row. Alexa’s voice has to trigger
Chappelle because she sounds like Scarlett Johansen between US military
subsidized estrogen throat blocker treatments. Again Chappelle, if America is so
racist, then why did Obama Be Good become President twice, besides him only
having to beat Mitt’s power tie collection from Brooks Brothers while promising
to reverse W’s path of never-ending prick return? Also, Trumpy Poo got the same
amount votes as Obama did. So, what’s your ultraultra-wise, soul deepening
quote on race relations in our country again Dave, besides Black Supremacist
Entertainers lives mattering most after Thug Lives Matter Most? Is it that the
80 million people who voted for Obama who voted for Trumpy Poo experienced a
sudden midlife white supremacist crisis after Obama rebranded ISIS ISIL, so
they’d sound more start friendly in the Business Insider? There’s an Obama
accomplishment you can be proud to cite on 97.1 with Funk Master Flex next time
you think it’s a good look defending rappers named Da Baby. How did all the
lispy, hell hole damned, Jewish trolls controlling the Internet according to
Dave, twist up Da Baby’s comments at a rap show in Miami, primo fagalah country
last time I checked again? When Da Baby said, “If you didn’t show up today
with HIV, AIDS, or any of them deadly sexually transmitted diseases that’ll
make you die in two to three weeks, then put your cell phone lighter up.”
It’s a good thing security checked for COVID vaccination passports before the
show then. Also, when Da Baby said, “If you didn’t show up today with HIV,
AIDS, or any of them deadly sexually transmitted diseases that’ll make you die
in two to three weeks, then put your cell phone lighter up.” Was Da Baby
thinking the gay junkie who got pricked with the HIV virus from dosing off on
top some miscellaneous dick on a bench in one of those autonomous zones in
Portlandia was barely hanging on by the thread of his hand me down Aids blanket
from the Salvation Army in South Beach, to the point where he couldn’t muster
the strength to raise his cell phone out of spite alone, only to yell,
“Ever heard of Truvada, bitches? Anti-Viral inhibitors rock, you
homophobic fucko’s. They actually prevent the virus from spreading, which is
more than I can say for masks, you Fauci Face Fuckers wannabes. And unless
you’ve had a friend or love die of Aids Chappelle, or Da Baby, then stop your
pussy yapping about gay feelings and Caitlyn Jenner being a better alpha man in
shear then you’ll ever be. Caitlyn Jenner used to grace the cover of Wheaties.
The only thing Da Baby covers is more deflecting projection on the behalf of
the hip-hop gay mafia. And enough with the word pandemic to describe COVID.
Aids will and always will be the most feared killer queen of them all. So, stop
acting like catching an itchy esophagus from COVID is worse than entry into the
Dallas Buyers Club, McConaughey. You only won an Oscar on the subject. So, stop
acting like you’re nothing more than an opportunistic, award sucker off
parasite like the rest, OK. Dennis Leary lives, Challah, thank you very much.
Am I the only one queasy from every hack journalist trying to soften the
blow of Chappelle being a black entertainer supremacist defender extremist? Who
gets his panties in a bunch because of members of the Trans community have
spoken out about his prolonged fixation on minimizing their feminine identity
because the majority are confused, privileged, white bitches, compared to the
King of The Persecution Complex, Lebron Drama Queen Diaries. Because guaranteed
max money contracts in the NBA, despite injury, contractual obligation or peer
pressure used to develop a strong move to your left is so oppressive.
If the wannabe Dick Gregory gave two shits about ennobling young
impressionable black men today, by switching their focus less on their
victimized mentality, then Half Baked would team up with Nike to a produce a
bunch of commercials with fake news fro Collin Kaepernick that use the
reimagined slogan, “Just Stop Resisting Arrest.” Now that would be a
step in the right direction for our country and the people you act like you’re
so interested in empowering like a stoner Curtis Mayfield in the making Dave.
Dear Jewish people, Dave Chapelle hates your guts, Jeff Ross included, when
he does a dumb, hacky joke about a colony of world controlling Aliens called
Space Jews because we control the Federal Reserve, the Western Wall and all the
banks in North Pole to. I hope Dave Chappelle hates my people more for my
funnier jokes than he’s capable of producing since he became a sellout hack who
thinks Trans teens who suffer from major mental health jokes are the height of
hilarity these days when other big boy targets remained untouched in his act
such as the CDC, China, what’s become of the Rape Enablement Party, Mr.,
Groper’s staged fake news White House production sets, Valerie Jarrett, Obama’s
live-in Arabian Horse Whisperer and author pusher of the nuke gifting deal to
Iran that freed up sanctions and gave them 150 billion dollars in unmarked
bills in the still of the night to make their economy less reliant on the sale
of hair removal products for the Kardashians. Also, your idol Richard Pryor
Dave, loved trans in the sack. In his autobiography Confessions, Pryor talks about
how a Trans lady was the best piece of pussy Bill Maher never had. And if
you’re going to finish strong Chapelle with your last special that’s so LBGT
focused, that’s called The Closer no less, how do you not wrap up your set
without any jokes about us learning how Ellen is besties with W now? Because
Ellen regardless of party affiliation, is pro bush all the way. What do Ellen
and W do together exactly? Invite Michelle Obama over on a Saturday night for a
game of Operation, gender reassignment addition? Do Ellen and Michelle watch
Portia De Rossi squirm with discomfort as W takes a break from painting maimed vets,
he gave PTSD to and do a portrait of Ellen’s slave wife property getting her
white privileged clit chopped off during Sharia Law Appreciation Century or
what? And Colin Kaepernick does sport a fake news fro. Have you ever seen a
bi-racial afro that large before? Slash tried to grow it out and it was a total
flop. Last, if Biden got more votes than Obama Dave, then Michelle Obama
suffers from PTSD for pissing on the ceiling fan in the Lincoln Bedroom after
Trump got sworn in. Hours later, Trump gets peed on for real from the Ceiling
Fan in the Lincoln Bedroom. Later, Trump tells Melania about the ceiling pan
peeing incident and says “Melania, is this what She-Hulk meant when she-he
said, when they go low, we aim, high.” Joan lives. Now, that’s a closer
proving you’re an equal opportunity offender, not another race defender
supremacist Dave.
Oh yeah, back to any self-respecting Jews left on this God blessed earth,
Dave Chappelle hates your funny Jew bone, especially when a plus gemry comes
from a big headed heeb like me who can capture the great Jeff Ross like no
other roasting another one of Dave’s cherished idols Jay Z, during Super Bowl
Sunday in the VIP room. Jeff Ross says, “Jigga Man, don’t you think child
separation can be a good thing? I mean, look how you turned out. Plus, if Coco
never got separated from his parents, he never would’ve become a mini–Los Lobos
in the making. Beyonce sitting out the national anthem was a classy move, Jay.
Let me guess, she got pissed because Demi Lovato singing the National Anthem
rubbed her the wrong way because Demi sounded too much like the white privileged
version of Alabama Shakes. Hey, don’t shoot the messenger Jigga. Can’t you just
hire Bennie Segal, do it? Or what about Damon Dash if the price is right? But
you can’t knock Snoop’s Dog’s new wine right Jigga? Wine Advocate says,
“Snoop’s Merlot tastes like mouthwash used in porn hood hell. Lucky for
you, Nas doesn’t fill up the new Yankee Stadium the way you did when you played
the first concert at the House That Gentrification Built. Gentrification, you
know liberal talk for less classy Cardi B’s and increased shots of unhealthy-looking
gay guys pounding Wheat Grass together at the new Jamba Juice in Fort Green on
Dekalb Avenue. Will Twitter allow you to admit you miss Trump a little bit
Jigga Man? I miss Trump’s relentless optimism and over the top salesmanship
personally. If Fuck Face Fauci shot up Trump with the dirty needle the Deep
State used to take out Easy E, Trump would tweet the next morning on whatever
hate speech spewing platform he’s allowed on next, “Do I have HIV? Yes,
but my T-Cell count numbers have never been stronger.” Can I get a holla,
for some Challah? Thank you very much.
Michael Kornbluth