No More Delta

How will the vaccine shot prevent no more Delta, when most of the new Delta cases are from Demonic Democrats who are vaccinated to begin with? Is AstraZeneca offering a new shot that get’s rid of the Delta strain if you resell your soul back to Dominion for a 100 bucks and a complimentary side of breadsticks?

What’s the new ad campaign for this new Delta strain prevention vaccination shot? You’re stuck with mask mandates on Delta anyway regardless if you get the new Delta strain vaccination shot or not, not that a specific Delta vaccine shot exists or been proven to be full proof yet. So go fuck your friendly skies. Mask Mandates are here to stay on Jet Blue to. So fuck your blue balls, for thinking you’d get a release from mask mandates, if you ever wanted to feel like an essential man of business travel again.



The delta coronavirus variant spreads as easily as the chickenpox according the CDC? Yeah, I don’t remember dying from the chicken pox either. I just recall some mild discomfort in a sand bath and watching The Price is the Right, feeling like a non essential Betty Draper on the rise.

The Delta coronavirus spreads as easily as the chickenpox. So you have to get the non FDA approved stab, or your kids school’s nurse will place you on double secret probation. Harold Ramis and Belushi live. Thank very much.



President Joe Biden announced that all 4 million federal workers would either have to be vaccinated against coronavirus or submit to strict testing and other measures such as social distancing, wearing masks or wearing ball gags made in China if you identify with being the gimpy bottom in Pulp Fiction. As long as the “Big Guy” keeps on getting his 10 percent of the big baller gagger cut.

Biden is also urging states to offer residents $100 as a vaccine incentive. If you’re worried about your parents cutting off from their HBO Max annual subscription if you dare reopening your Facebook to post about election fraud.

Disney theme parks are now requiring all guests to wear masks indoors. That also includes Micky Mouse underneath his suit underneath the pillow case underneath signed by David Duke.



‘Broadway theater owners say that any person who attends a live theater event must be vaccinated and wear a mask. Those aged under 12 will not be permitted at most theaters. So that’s how the Podesta brothers plan on swooping in all that available, young hot dog talent.



The CEO of Pfizer says the Pfizer/BioNTech vaccine’s efficacy goes from 96% to 84% after six months. In other words, you can’t keep your fake news security blanket back to normalcy, you Jihadi John jerker offer you.

California public health officials now recommend all residents wear masks in all public indoor settings. Like that’s a turn off at the Santa Monica Library even pre-COVID. I thought the world economy getting cratered just to get Trump Poo out of office stinks.

New York City will pay residents $100 to get vaccinated, according to Mayor Bill de Blasio. But we still don’t have functioning weed dispensaries yet after Massachusetts. So I’ll pass on blowing it on shitty sprayed weed from the Bronx that tastes like Windex, thanks.

EU countries have now administered more coronavirus vaccine doses per 100 people than the U.S. But all the unpunished, rapes, beheadings and acid attacks from the open borders migration crowd offset that meaningless statistic LinkedIn. Who cares if the EU has administered more COVID vaccine does per 100 people than the U.S? All that means is, Americans aren’t such dumb fucks compared to Paddington Bear nation after all.



Michael Kornbluth

No More Delta

How will the vaccine shot prevent no more Delta, when most of the new Delta cases are from Demonic Democrats who are vaccinated to begin with? Is AstraZeneca offering a new shot that get’s rid of the Delta strain if you resell your soul back to Dominion for a 100 bucks and a complimentary side of breadsticks?

What’s the new ad campaign for this new Delta strain prevention vaccination shot? You’re stuck with mask mandates on Delta anyway regardless if you get the new Delta strain vaccination shot or not, not that a specific Delta vaccine shot exists or been proven to be full proof yet. So go fuck your friendly skies. Mask Mandates are here to stay on Jet Blue to. So fuck your blue balls, for thinking you’d get a release from mask mandates, if you ever wanted to feel like an essential man of business travel again.

The delta coronavirus variant spreads as easily as the chickenpox according the CDC? Yeah, I don’t remember dying from the chicken pox either. I just recall some mild discomfort in a sand bath and watching The Price is the Right, feeling like a non essential Betty Draper on the rise.

The Delta coronavirus spreads as easily as the chickenpox. So you have to get the non FDA approved stab, or your kids school’s nurse will place you on double secret probation. Harold Ramis and Belushi live. Thank very much.

President Joe Biden announced that all 4 million federal workers would either have to be vaccinated against coronavirus or submit to strict testing and other measures such as social distancing, wearing masks or wearing ball gags made in China if you identify with being the gimpy bottom in Pulp Fiction. As long as the “Big Guy” keeps on getting his 10 percent of the big baller gagger cut.

Biden is also urging states to offer residents $100 as a vaccine incentive. If you’re worried about your parents cutting off from their HBO Max annual subscription if you dare reopening your Facebook to post about election fraud.

Disney theme parks are now requiring all guests to wear masks indoors. That also includes Micky Mouse underneath his suit underneath the pillow case underneath signed by David Duke.

‘Broadway theater owners say that any person who attends a live theater event must be vaccinated and wear a mask. Those aged under 12 will not be permitted at most theaters. So that’s how the Podesta brothers plan on swooping in all that available, young hot dog talent.

The CEO of Pfizer says the Pfizer/BioNTech vaccine’s efficacy goes from 96% to 84% after six months. In other words, you can’t keep your fake news security blanket back to normalcy, you Jihadi John jerker offer you.

California public health officials now recommend all residents wear masks in all public indoor settings. Like that’s a turn off at the Santa Monica Library even pre-COVID. I thought the world economy getting cratered just to get Trump Poo out of office stinks.

New York City will pay residents $100 to get vaccinated, according to Mayor Bill de Blasio. But we still don’t have functioning weed dispensaries yet after Massachusetts. So I’ll pass on blowing it on shitty sprayed weed from the Bronx that tastes like Windex, thanks.

EU countries have now administered more coronavirus vaccine doses per 100 people than the U.S. But all the unpunished, rapes, beheadings and acid attacks from the open borders migration crowd offset that meaningless statistic LinkedIn. Who cares if the EU has administered more COVID vaccine does per 100 people than the U.S? All that means is, Americans aren’t such dumb fucks compared to Paddington Bear nation after all.

Michael Kornbluth

Beyond Personal

More hardcore edge is funnier.

Governor Cuomo getting paid to write about leadership is like R Kelly getting early release to babysit the latest Kardashian out of the womb, Woody Allen writing a book on hands off parenting or Kevin Durant, Mr. Millennial Mouseketeer himself, getting picked to do a Ted Talk on how to defend yourself against Cyberbullying.

Celebrity couples who can’t keep their hands off each other are stuck in a perpetual sweaty sex period. That’s the secret sauce ingredient that makes any sexually charged relationships stick.

Russell Simmons addressing rape allegations with Gayle King. Gayle, read my lisp. I didn’t rape any of those vengeful over the hill ho’s.

New marketing idea for my book Do It All Dad Does Jokes. Donate them to the Bedford Hills Correctional Facility where Martha Stewart stayed. Sample some Snoop Dog jokes to the Corrections Officer in charge of accepting donations for the Prison Library. “Have you tried Snoop Dog’s new red wine yet? Wine Spectator says it tastes like mouthwash used in Porn Hood Hell. Can I donate some Dr. Seuss books or are they not woke enough for the Warden’s tastes? Did you hear? Dr. Seuss is racist for drawing a pic of an African wearing a grass skirt. I didn’t know Fubu was in fashion yet.” Correction Officer laughs long time.

Dad giving you parenting advice 3 grandchildren later over the phone again from Arizona is annoying. Oh, you don’t like the idea of your granddaughter attending Cornell University eventually because of a sudden mental health concerns post COVID pops? I think all the outsourced, invisible suicide nets used in factories for Nike and Apple in China got the 13 Reasons Why class covered pops. I bet Cornell made a Suicide Prevention App that has the Skulls and Bones logo on the button to make their snowflake prone students feel extra protected inside. Like Cornell alum Bill Maher for getting away with naming his production company Kid Love Productions, with no media inquiry into its pedo friendly name whatsoever.  If W’s kids weren’t such airheads, they’d download that app at Yale, knowing the Skulls and Bones logo makes you immune to fucking up again consequences like W after 9/11 for doing dick to prevent the inside job on his watch. Plus, whenever you press the Suicide Prevention App button, Bang Your Head by Quiet Riot plays pops, which gets you out of your head after you try to headbutt Joe Rogan through your laptop for promoting how much his CBD oil matters man, despite it giving you no mental lift worth giving a shit about whatsoever like any heady rush takeaways from the Dax Sheppard podcast. Oh, yeah, Joe Rogan wannabe be CBD decciple, Deadheads only attend Dead Shows for the drugs. I don’t think Dicks Dead Picks lists tracers only dude.  But seriously pops, once you press that suicide prevention app and hear Bang Your Head by Quiet Riot, your anxiety levels drop lower than Al Gore’s balls at the sight of finding one more Klondike bar left in his sub-zero freezer on the 4th of July.  

Imagine a kid trying to jump off a bridge at Cornell only to bump into the invisible net. Kid says, “I can’t even ace a perfect landing right.”

This is my impression of a Tour Guide at Cornell downplaying mental health concerns for the incoming class of 2021. “Freshman don’t even have time to squeeze in a 20-minute Peloton ride between classes. White Pelton Privilege doesn’t exist behind these Ivy draped walls. So, what makes you think, Cornell Freshman can afford to spend their down time attending pill parties, listening to 13 Reason Why on Vinyl backwards? While looking for secret hidden messages like, “Sell your soul to Apple Music like Trent Reznor did. And you’ll look less tormented menacing in 700-dollar leather jackets in no time.” Also kids today post COVID can’t enough of social distancing, especially after their ears get raped to death from all the yenta breath sorority sisters during rush week in the school cafeteria, chanting, “Gama Roe, were so hot. We rock the Keto diet. So, we don’t become fat feminist Karen bots.”

Don’t go there question on Thanksgiving. So, dad, what brings you more shame, your son getting addicted to opioids or your eldest trying to wean himself off the comment section of the Gateway Pundit? You never heard of it? Its’ another alt right, dirt rag like the rest, according to Uni Brow Maddow at MSNBC. Hey dad, tell me if you think this impression is funny. This is Chris Matthews sexually harassing a new chesty, yenta breath intern from Long Island on MSNBC. Eating out Maddow, counts as your lunch break babe.”

Waiting for my car appointment to get a new key and some old guy starts asking questions about login codes for the internet. I said, “What are you really missing out on, besides the Do It All Dad Year Podcast and Do It All Dad Year Blog? Personally, I want to kick it old school and get a flip phone again if I’m honest about only wanting to hear my own opinions most of the time.  Describe the Internet is 3 words, “I’m smarter stupid.”  Also, I want to start using my imagination for jerking off again, so I don’t feel like a slacker jerkoff at the same time in real time. Are you feeling me yet old timer? Old timer says, “I like using the Internet to read articles from the New York Times and Washington Post. I say, “Nobody’s perfect. Billy Wilder lives. I don’t do unnamed sources like you know who.” Holla, thank you very much.

At the library trying to donate some books and getting endless laughs by pitching all the book titles of my books to donate to a local prison in Bedford after the recommendation like Controlling My Kids With Comedy, A Love Story, Do It All Dad Does Jokes, etc. Then, the librarian says, “You remind me of my nephew. He’s a comedian.” I say, “Your warm-hearted embrace of my funny man identity doesn’t remind me of my mother one bit.”

Why should I care about the Swiss beating the French in soccer? The Swiss are guilty of cultural appropriation by storing Mark Chagal designer lamps for their Nazi rulers to sell at Sotheby’s  whenever they needed to stock up on more Malbec and crystal meth during their golden years, living it up in the Andes mountains, while writing more glowing reviews of Mein Kamp on Amazon under Nazi Scientist Protection Programs Rule.

New agent seduction plan. Only purse female lit agents, that give me sustained stiffage, which is extended arousal derived from their money shot loaded manuscript sales list. Playing with the idea of making mama jealous with a new potential Jewish Godmother fill in lover embracer regarding the totality of me wouldn’t hurt my increased motivation factor to woo them with more than my pulsating prose either.

Getting a new key at the Toyota dealership and start flirting with the slightly chesty, pretty faced enough, raven black haired, Latino gal who helped reorder the key for me prior in painless, super-fast fashion. I made her laugh long time prior the day before, when I said, “I don’t mind waiting. My unhuggable C Word of a mother-in-law is being forced to play fake news involved grandma for the week, so I’m whistling dixie regardless. Today, I say, the name Vilma is growing more on me every day. It’s more cinematic sounding than Penelope Cruz. In fact, I think Pedro Almodovar should make you his new muse and kick that uppity lisp to the curb.  Everyone working there laughs long time. I add,” I’m glad that my Philosophy and Film Class that my parents paid 50 thousand dollars for just materialized there.” The entire Toyota worker crew laughs long time again. United we laugh, oh, what a feeling.

Michael Kornbluth